About nash1991 : Just a simple student at the IU School of Dentistry.
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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, my mother said she trusted me enough to go with me for my first drive in my new car. As soon as we got in the car, she started hyperventilating and screaming we're going to crash. I didn't even start the engine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27016) - you deserved it (2086)
On 10/10/2009 at 1:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (West Berkshire)
Today, my friends took my phone and changed all the contact's names to characters from Harry Potter. I have over a hundred contacts and no idea who I'm talking to. I've been texting Draco Malfoy for 4 hours now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15473) - you deserved it (2686)
On 09/18/2009 at 4:41am - misc - by MissMSE (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (51048) - you deserved it (11675)
On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was getting mugged. In shock, I said, "Are you mugging me?!" To which the mugger responded, "Duh, do you think I grabbed you for your looks?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (42384) - you deserved it (6311)
On 08/04/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was woken up by a loud noise, which I thought was an earthquake. It sounded like a car had driven right into my living room. Which was exactly what it was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48285) - you deserved it (1462)
On 08/03/2009 at 8:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my 250 lb ex-Marine dad announced he was going to start randomly punching me in the crotch, without warning, to "improve my reflexes." FML
I agree, your life sucks (55428) - you deserved it (4005)
On 08/02/2009 at 6:45pm - health - by theregoesmyspermcount (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I come home to find my nephew holding pieces of my new $3,500 Sony Video Camera. He told me he threw it out the window because it was a portal for aliens. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42383) - you deserved it (2786)
On 07/06/2009 at 2:41pm - misc - by AidenFromSweden (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, I went to announce to my son that I am pregnant again. After I told him, he looks up and yells: "fuck this shit!" and walks out of the room. My son is nine years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56213) - you deserved it (20772)
On 06/27/2009 at 12:05am - kids - by poormom (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, while walking in the mall, I had two people race past me in wheelchairs. Thinking they were racing, I started rooting for the one guy that was ahead. Turns out his wheelchair was malfunctioning and the other was chasing after to help. He then slammed and fell into the water fountain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34265) - you deserved it (12101)
On 06/20/2009 at 10:29pm - misc - by meantowheels (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML
I agree, your life sucks (68938) - you deserved it (16885)
On 06/11/2009 at 7:52am - work - by apav (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was in the cafeteria when I noticed a new worker cleaning a table. As I passed her, she looked up and smiled at me. Thinking she was pulling a funny face, I jokingly crossed my eyes and smiled back. She looked hurt and continued working. Later, she served me my lunch. She was actually cross-eyed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9968) - you deserved it (52625)
On 06/10/2009 at 3:42pm - work - by crosseyed (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)
Today, I got a phone call from a number I didn't recognize. It was a man with a speech impediment, and I began imitating him. He was the manager of a store I applied at. He wanted to arrange an interview. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8240) - you deserved it (156138)
On 05/24/2009 at 10:50am - work - by oopsie (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got a call saying that my son was chasing all the girls in the class with his "Sword of Death", otherwise known as my dildo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (75275) - you deserved it (35502)
On 05/21/2009 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by a (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24545) - you deserved it (106471)
On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was at the doctor and I had to get a "finger stick" in the lab to get blood drawn. There was a 6 year old boy waiting to go next. He was terrified. His mother told him to "watch this brave girl go first." I panicked and began to hyperventilate. The boy fainted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38393) - you deserved it (6781)
On 05/16/2009 at 11:20am - misc - by bosssssssss765432 - United States (New York)
Monday 20 May 2013
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