About nash1991 : 3rd year Medical school student. I'm sarcasm personified. Love my S5. R1 got stolen... RIP :(
nash1991's FML badges
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
nash1991's favorite FMLs
Today, while brushing my teeth, a fly flew into my mouth. It got caught in my electric toothbrush and was sucked into the circular bristles, getting crushed between the brush and my braces. I now have fly guts and goo stuck between my brackets, and I can't get rid of the taste. FML
by PackardBell / 03/27/2016 at 11:09pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals
by 1meme129 / 02/24/2016 at 9:12am / United States (Colorado) / Kids
Today, I went to my required district science fair with my project about gliders and was a bit unprepared in terms of personal knowledge on the science behind gliders. I was hoping I would get a judge who didn't know a lot about aerodynamics. One of my judges was a glider pilot. FML
by rmonk / 02/24/2016 at 8:13am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/24/2016 at 4:59am / United States (Iowa) / Love
by Anonymous / 02/21/2016 at 2:02pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to console my bawling 6-year-old son and explain that his sister was lying when she told him that when boys in our family turn 13, they turn into girls. I'm not sure who disappoints me more right now. FML
by jts / 02/20/2016 at 4:55am / United States (North Carolina) / Kids
Today, I went to a bingo club with my gran and won the second game and a butthurt old lady accused me of cheating. I ended up being taken aside by an apologetic member of staff and asked to leave. I'm still trying to figure out how you can even cheat at bingo. FML
by Anonymous / 02/20/2016 at 3:21am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up with an extremely irritable rash around my crotch. I didn't want to full out itch it by putting my hands down my pants, so I itched it by putting my hand in my pockets. I got kicked off the train for "pleasuring myself in public." FML
by IsThisRealLife / 02/01/2016 at 12:00pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy
Today, I visited my 90-year-old great-grandmother and her boyfriend. This wouldn't be a problem, if this boyfriend wasn't different than the one she had yesterday. She told me not to tell him about "the other one". FML
by anon / 02/01/2016 at 11:37am / United States / Love
Today, my friends and I were goofing off playing tag behind the local church, when I heard a banshee-like wail behind me. Assuming it was one of my friends, I wailed right back and ran. Turned out there was actually a funeral going on, and the wail was from one of the bereaved. FML
by Anonymous / 01/27/2016 at 8:30am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/19/2016 at 6:03am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy
Today, I arrived at work to find a bullet hole in the window of the storefront we're leasing. Security assured me it had always been there and the glass shards on the floor had somehow been missed in my many vacuum passes and the pre-lease inspection two months ago, so no need to worry or fix it. FML
by anonymous / 01/08/2016 at 1:49am / United States / Work
Today, my dad took my car keys off my keychain and hid them from me. His reasoning was, "I don't want you to be driving during the winter." Guess who has to walk ten miles a day to work, through the New England snow. FML
by tiredofbullshit / 01/08/2016 at 1:06am / United States (New Hampshire) / Transportation
Today, I was chilling in my comfy zip-up sweatshirt when I realized I was running late for an acting class. In my mad panic, I forgot I didn't have a shirt or bra underneath. Later in class, I was performing a scene and started to unzip my sweatshirt. You can figure out the rest. FML
by AccidentalFlasher / 01/07/2016 at 9:08pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to listen to my brother whine yet again about being single and how unfair it is. This is a guy who owns an "I fuck on the first date" t-shirt and has more than once referred to women as "vaginas with a person attached". Last time I called him out for being such a dick, I got punched. FML
by Anonymous / 01/03/2016 at 9:01am / United Kingdom (Leeds) / Miscellaneous