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nasazile

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nasazile

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  • Number of visits : 543
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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nasazile's page activity

Visits<b>xMrsCarlilex</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 1:13pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 11:44am<b>mikester10723</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 12:09pm<b>woah_there04</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 6:43pm<b>HyperFUSE</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 7:44pm

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nasazile's favorite FMLs

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

#21293465
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33044) - you deserved it (6416)

On 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm - love - by notsofriendly (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after my shower, I went to clear off my fogged-up mirror. Doing so, I noticed a handprint on it. I compared it to my hand, but it was much too small. I live alone. FML

#21292770
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35722) - you deserved it (2189)

On 11/05/2014 at 3:44pm - misc - by spooked - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I saw what my mom handed out for trick-or-treaters last night. Toothbrushes. Yup, we're that house. FML

#21289931
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33676) - you deserved it (2799)

On 11/01/2014 at 6:22pm - kids - by ThaBoss12 - United States (California)

Today, I had my first job interview. The manager asks me to sell him his pen. Thinking I'm all smart, I reenact the scene from the Wolf of Wall Street and say, 'Write down your name'. He calmly reaches into his drawer, takes out another pen and writes his name down. He then looks at me and laughs. FML

#21287428
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31357) - you deserved it (7788)

On 10/29/2014 at 12:55am - work - by shadysheikh - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

#21282836
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32190) - you deserved it (3357)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm - work - by Australian Lifeguard - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

#21265897
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35723) - you deserved it (3649)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I went to use the porta potty at the construction site I work at and found two homeless people having sex in it. I almost got fired, because my advisor blamed me. FML

#21264426
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (327) - you deserved it (2678)

On 09/24/2014 at 9:58am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning on having sex. He first excused himself to the bathroom, then returned with a sad face saying he had fumbled with himself in the bathroom to get "ready" and accidentally came. He said, "I was thinking of you though." FML

Today, my psychotic, very jealous ex-boyfriend appeared out of nowhere and punched a male store clerk who was helping me look for azaleas in a garden center. FML

#21264094
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33854) - you deserved it (2573)

On 09/23/2014 at 9:19pm - love - by Tag (woman) - Australia

Today, at my father's funeral, they were playing the song from Phantom of the Opera where she sings about her lost father. Apparently the song organizer forgot to edit out the part where her romantic interest runs toward her and yells, "That... That THING is not your father!" FML

#21245330
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35635) - you deserved it (2609)

On 08/25/2014 at 7:55pm - misc - by NotThePhantom - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46209) - you deserved it (7635)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I was scrubbing the bloody aftermath of a successful mouse trap off of my stove with an old toothbrush. After a few good scrubs, out of habit I put the toothbrush in my mouth while I turned on the water. FML

Today, I watched a Youtube video about artists who ripped off other artist's songs. All of the bands that were accused of stealing were all bands that I really enjoy. FML

#21194507
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34722) - you deserved it (9778)

On 07/01/2014 at 12:12am - misc - by dillon (woman) - United States (Arkansas)



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