About narutofan001 : All you need to know about me is that there is nothing to know.
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narutofan001's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 01/27/2014 at 6:32pm / Puerto Rico / Love
by unicorn_skies / 01/18/2014 at 3:33am / United States (California) / Money
Today, to avoid a guy who's been creepily following me around school lately, I ducked into the girl's bathroom. After few minutes, he stuck his head in with his eyes closed and asked if I was done yet. FML
by stalked / 01/08/2014 at 3:27pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by LeaveHimAlone / 12/29/2013 at 11:23pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, a kid from my school called me, saying he's going on vacation to Japan soon and that since I was born there, I could teach him the language. His exact words at the start of the call were: "Hey man, you speak Asian, right?" I have to be around this shithead 5 days a week. FML
by bnc / 12/14/2013 at 5:39pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/03/2013 at 9:04am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by eastsiderounder / 12/02/2013 at 12:11pm / United States (Utah) / Intimacy
Today, my fiancé left me waiting at the train station for two and a half hours because he offered his ex-girlfriend a lift to her friends wedding that was a few cities away. I normally wouldn't have minded, but I'm 6 months pregnant and it was pouring with rain. FML
by ali456 / 12/01/2013 at 10:16am / United Kingdom (Dudley) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/29/2013 at 3:23am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/27/2013 at 11:28am / United States (Ohio) / Love
Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML
by MissYouPieceOfSkin / 11/27/2013 at 3:44am / United States (Washington) / Health
Today, my boss's obese bully of a grandson had a seizure. Being the only physician around, I had to rush in to tend to him. Except it wasn't a seizure as such. My daughter had found my taser and used it on him. FML
by Anonymous / 11/26/2013 at 2:05pm / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, my workplace had a big employee photoshoot for an ad campaign. I was there all of 30 seconds before the photographer said, "What the fuck? Look guys, this ain't an ad for facial abortions." He then asked me and another colleague to step out of the shot. FML
by fuggers :/ / 11/24/2013 at 4:38pm / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Work
Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML
by I hate that game / 11/23/2013 at 11:11am / United Kingdom (Wigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at a party with a few of my friends. We saw a guy walking around with bright pink lipstick all over his mouth, so we made a bet to see who could match the lipstick to the girl first. I won. It was my girlfriend's. FML
by Anonymous / 11/11/2013 at 10:55am / United States / Love