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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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mysmjas

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mysmjas
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2216
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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mysmjas's favorite FMLs

Today, the guy I liked for years asked me out. I instantly said yes. As I was walking away, I forgot I was at the top of the stairs and feel down 20 steps. He stood at the top and laughed. FML

#8837679 (88)

I agree, your life sucks (14374) - you deserved it (3775)

On 03/05/2010 at 12:24am - love - by harro101 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I tried to see if you can kick yourself in the nuts. You can. FML

#8581671 (265)

I agree, your life sucks (3172) - you deserved it (43959)

On 02/23/2010 at 4:28am - misc - by nutcracker (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)

Today, I was at McDonald's. I bumped into a guy, and as I was helping him pick up his food, I realized he was cute. I began smiling and I was about to introduce myself, when he began laughing and said ,"It's you! I've heard about you!" He left laughing. I still don't know who he is, or what made him laugh. FML

#8397954 (153)

I agree, your life sucks (19997) - you deserved it (2108)

On 02/18/2010 at 1:38am - misc - by Lizzielollipop816 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I brought my new girlfriend over to show off to my family when my senile great-grandmother walked into the room wearing nothing but her underpants asking when the Olympics come on. FML

#8366162 (116)

I agree, your life sucks (16281) - you deserved it (1496)

On 02/17/2010 at 2:30am - misc - by unfortunate419 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my pet rat had babies. We've only ever owned one rat. FML

#8341933 (404)

I agree, your life sucks (18553) - you deserved it (3884)

On 02/16/2010 at 3:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, a black cat crossed in front of my truck and I thought to myself that it was funny people believe black cats bring bad luck. Not even two minutes later, I drove my truck into a ditch. FML

#8338090 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (12664) - you deserved it (6578)

On 02/16/2010 at 12:56pm - animals - by matiasbarbero - United States

Today, I sat a client down for his haircut. He pulled off his hat and his hair was dripping wet. I asked him if he had just washed it. He responded, "No, but isn't it a hot day out?" No, it's twenty degrees and overcast today. FML

#8336543 (195)

I agree, your life sucks (17216) - you deserved it (1391)

On 02/16/2010 at 11:35am - work - by kennarama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I took my girlfriends virginity and had given it my all. When I had finished, sweating and tired, I looked down at her and smiled, obviously pleased with myself. She looked up at me and said, "Wait, was that it?" FML

#8317685 (284)

I agree, your life sucks (14697) - you deserved it (3597)

On 02/15/2010 at 10:10pm - intimacy - by sadsexer23 - United States (Virginia)

Today, while at a family get together, my bowels suddenly decided they needed to be emptied. Straight away. I felt bad enough using someone else's bathroom for this, but later, my sister came in and loudly said "God, Brian, what the hell have you been eating?" in front of everyone at the get together. FML

#8285725 (107)

I agree, your life sucks (14066) - you deserved it (1921)

On 02/15/2010 at 2:08am - misc - by MisterBrown (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend and I went on a 1 day cruise to the Bahamas. It happened to be on the same day of the worst sailing conditions. We spent 6 hours throwing up together. Him into the sink, and me into the toilet. We spent $200 to see the inside of our cabin's bathroom. FML

#8280638 (97)

I agree, your life sucks (15608) - you deserved it (2035)

On 02/15/2010 at 12:03am - love - by SeaSick (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I made heart shaped cookies for my girlfriend. My mom's reaction? "They look like dicks." FML

#8268045 (155)

I agree, your life sucks (11298) - you deserved it (2410)

On 02/14/2010 at 9:16pm - intimacy - by adam - United States (Illinois)

Today, I received my first Valentine's day present ever: a dead mouse from my cat. FML

#8241571 (124)

I agree, your life sucks (14517) - you deserved it (2237)

On 02/14/2010 at 8:24am - animals - by lex31 - United States

Today, it snowed in South Carolina for the first time in 10 years. It snowed eight whole inches! I was so excited, I yelled for my kids and ran outside to build a snowman. I ran out to the steps and slipped on ice. I woke up in the hospital with a bad concussion. The snow had all melted. FML

#8210549 (293)

I agree, your life sucks (21385) - you deserved it (3604)

On 02/13/2010 at 3:11pm - kids - by owwie - United States

Today, I put my hamster in his ball, and spent about an hour cleaning his cage. When I came back, I realized he wasn't even alive. FML

#8189417 (114)

I agree, your life sucks (14743) - you deserved it (4687)

On 02/13/2010 at 12:04am - animals - by Chris - United States (California)

Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML

#8158295 (173)

I agree, your life sucks (22860) - you deserved it (1489)

On 02/12/2010 at 2:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)