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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19653) - you deserved it (35901)
On 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Wawawiwa (woman) - Namibia (Windhoek)
Today, I was crying because my cat died. My boyfriend cupped my face in his hands, looked me straight into the eyes and said, "I love seeing you cry." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26349) - you deserved it (2279)
On 03/10/2010 at 11:08am - love - by sliceddice (woman) - Denmark (Staden Kobenhavn)
Today, I found out that my mom is not only reading my mail, but she is also withholding letters from my bank, college, and insurance company. Why? Because "they could be inappropriate" for me to read. I'm 25. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20106) - you deserved it (2233)
On 03/09/2010 at 9:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Poland (Katowice)
Today, I went on a date with a guy that I met at a masquerade. The moment he saw me without my mask on, he left the date. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17371) - you deserved it (2073)
On 03/07/2010 at 12:38pm - misc - by workinggirl (woman) - United States (Montana)
Today, I was eating pizza with my girlfriend. She got sauce on the corner of her mouth so I tried to be sexy and lick it off. It wasn't sauce, it was a cluster of zits. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14305) - you deserved it (24625)
On 03/07/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by choldcreations - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I texted a somewhat overweight girl I wanted to hook up with and asked her "Have you been dating anyone lately?" Unfortunately with predictive text, "dating" came out as "eating". I didn't realize it till after it sent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12616) - you deserved it (19468)
On 12/15/2009 at 3:32am - love - by Proof-Reader (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend left for a month-long trip with his buddies. I stood near the door waiting for a goodbye kiss. He kissed his xbox goodbye instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28393) - you deserved it (3867)
On 10/10/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by kissless (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, I met a great girl at a party. We talked alone, and she made me promise I'd dance with her later. When I saw her later, she was unconscious, and in an ambulance. She'd collapsed, and the entire party assumed I'd spiked her drink. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40116) - you deserved it (1743)
On 07/05/2009 at 11:58am - love - by curiousorange (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I found out that my boyfriend is cheating on me, with the same guy I was cheating on him with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52096) - you deserved it (133757)
On 07/03/2009 at 10:16am - misc - by shandrith (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping in the dog world meant dominance. Well, I decided to instill my dominance and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22840) - you deserved it (99489)
On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML
I agree, your life sucks (121598) - you deserved it (28951)
On 05/02/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Dunzo15 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I put my AIM status on my Current iTunes song. It also does it for videos I don't know. I've downloaded a lot of porn in my iTunes, and I wanted to watch. My status on AIM was "Girl in Latex gets fucked in the ass." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12724) - you deserved it (102337)
On 04/04/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by ohshittttttt - United States (New York)
Today, I texted my boyfriend to see if he wanted to finally have sex today. His response was "Can't, Platinum just came out." I didn't know what that meant so I searched "Platinum 3-22-2009" on Google. I found out he's talking about a new Pokémon game. FML
I agree, your life sucks (94723) - you deserved it (14819)
On 03/22/2009 at 10:15pm - intimacy - by thisreallysucks2 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (37637) - you deserved it (431083)
On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, there was a story called "Looking Good" about fashion in school that ran in the local newspaper. On the front page of that section it featured a picture of my class. I was photoshopped out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54883) - you deserved it (3373)
On 03/05/2009 at 4:36pm - misc - by failout (man) - United States (California)
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