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Mobility
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Today, after finally dropping my weight from an overweight 200 to a slim 135, my skin is now loose everywhere, and stretches about two inches out on my stomach. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25105) - you deserved it (4948)
On 12/26/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by cloud7 -
Today, I was in a store with my dad. He completely lost his temper and began yelling at the store owners. For some reason, he then removed his shirt in protest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27235) - you deserved it (2023)
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML
I agree, your life sucks (33591) - you deserved it (8036)
On 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm - intimacy - by Wisconsin love - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I caught my daughter attempting to stick pencils up our cat's butt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32932) - you deserved it (4324)
On 11/29/2010 at 10:03pm - kids - by Laura -
Today, my grandma walked into my room and asked if the thing lying on my nightstand was a computer. I said ''Grandma, that's a clock.'' After staring at me, confused for a few seconds, she then farted, and left my room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34575) - you deserved it (4383)
On 11/23/2010 at 12:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I shadowed an ultrasound technician for my future career. She did an ultrasound on me to show me how to do the job. I found out I was pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39562) - you deserved it (9130)
On 11/16/2010 at 10:34am - misc - by nicolette5785452 - United States (Ohio)
Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47489) - you deserved it (6507)
On 11/13/2010 at 2:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, a girl who has had a problem with me for as long as I can remember, tagged me in a Facebook status update in which she equated my intelligence to that of a mollusk and equated my weight to that of a hippopotamus. My boyfriend, as well as several of my "friends," liked it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22724) - you deserved it (3548)
On 11/10/2010 at 12:33pm - misc - by smarter than a mollusk, skinner than a hippo - United States
Today, I asked my boyfriend if I could call him "love muffin". He asked if he could call me "muffin top". FML
I agree, your life sucks (7952) - you deserved it (23124)
On 11/04/2010 at 4:30pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was sitting on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy came and sat next to me. Next thing I know, he farts loudly, then proudly looks my way. I stared back in shock. He says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49247) - you deserved it (9964)
On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)
I agree, your life sucks (29948) - you deserved it (4243)
On 10/17/2010 at 9:55am - kids - by Ashley Marshburn - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I saw my boyfriend shaving his pubic hair before we had sex. This would be fine, except he was saying "Nom nom nom, I eat cock hairs" to his electric razor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32657) - you deserved it (7419)
On 10/17/2010 at 1:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28958) - you deserved it (16286)
On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)
Today, I fainted because of a condition I have. My husband, who was standing right there, failed to catch me because he didn't want to drop his yogurt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26850) - you deserved it (2805)
On 10/12/2010 at 5:52pm - health - by anon - United States (California)
Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24350) - you deserved it (6997)
On 10/09/2010 at 1:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)
Monday 17 June 2013
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