Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

mvonneumann

Search for a member

mvonneumann
  • Town/Country : byron bay, Australia
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 16 February 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 266
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mvonneumann : no

mvonneumann's last visitors

georginarose95

mvonneumann's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

mvonneumann's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend jumped, naked, onto my computer desk, with the intention of having sex on it. A new, £250 computer desk, broken beyond repair. And we didn't even have sex. FML

#4662087
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46754) - you deserved it (6470)

On 08/19/2009 at 6:38pm - intimacy - by kneesarethenewdesk (man) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I threw a party while my parents were gone. I forgot that our alarm automatically turns on at 11 pm, so when people opened the door, it went off. I couldn't find the number for the alarm company, so the cops showed up. Everyone started cheering because they thought they were strippers. FML

#4646350
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8919) - you deserved it (37783)

On 08/19/2009 at 1:13am - misc - by Life of the party - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mom explained to me that looking up gay porn on the internet is bad. I didn't look up gay porn. The only other person who uses the laptop is my dad. I couldn't tell her the truth and had to pretend I enjoy gay fanfiction. FML

#4645462
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47212) - you deserved it (3632)

On 08/19/2009 at 12:41am - misc - by weeks (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a 7 year old girl came up to me and told me to fuck myself. I told her to watch her language or else I'd tell her parents. Her mom happened to be nearby and actually heard this conversation, she came up to me and told me to fuck myself as well. FML

#696283
519 comments

I agree, your life sucks (197623) - you deserved it (18168)

On 03/30/2009 at 1:06am - kids - by Wmsys32pr9 (man) - United States (Washington)



Max Grünfeld's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Worst Sisters Ever
  • Growing up with a sister can be a good thing. If you're a guy, it can teach you about girls and how to interact with them so you won't grow up to be a sexist idiot who's afraid of women and who can only…

Monday 17 June 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on:

© 2008-2013 by