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murph

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murph

6Fucked!

murphmurph
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 June 1977 (38 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5425
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About murph : From Vermont, got a garden, it's sweet. Atheist and ordained minister. Got 3 daughters and a shotgun. Voting for Bernie.

murph's page activity

Visits<b>blahblahbullshit</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 8:16pm<b>Iwannarock1</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 7:09am<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 3:29am<b>brunanolasco</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 5:57pm<b>yerawizardlizzy</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 3:55pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 3:22pm<b>Malteser95</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 3:21pm<b>blazerman</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 9:08pm<b>lkah</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 8:46pm<b>saxyguy</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 5:47pm<b>JustinJK</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 4:12pm<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 3:30pm<b>faerieonacid</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 3:24pm<b>Furby94</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 2:56pm<b>demix</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 4:27am<b>Dynosaur_dollie</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 1:18am<b>crocks97</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 3:20pm<b>smeegle</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 6:56pm

Fucked!<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 9:22pm<b>blazerman</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 3:08am<b>alicat089</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 10:33pm<b>milkie</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 5:45pm<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 1:45pm<b>psshhh</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 10:40am

murph's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of murph's badges

murph's favorite FMLs

Today, barely 2 hours into a 5 hour car ride home, my mom accidentally let slip that she's been cheating on my dad. I had to sit with the bitch in a diner for ages while my dad bawled his eyes out alone in the car. FML

#21523579
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20958) - you deserved it (1072)

On 02/07/2016 at 1:11am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was forced to get up in front of ten swim teams, including my own, and a hundred spectators to swim 100 yards with an obvious boner sticking out of my suit. FML

#21523419
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19071) - you deserved it (3305)

On 02/06/2016 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by notagoodtime - United States (California)

Today, I told my step-mom that my medication is causing me to lose weight. She looked me up and down and suggested I triple my dosage. FML

#21523215
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17809) - you deserved it (1758)

On 02/05/2016 at 10:11pm - misc - by cuntingbitchofawhore - United States (Indiana)

Today, while at work at a small Microsoft partner company, I had to write an email explaining why Internet Explorer is superior to Google Chrome. FML

#21523050
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21667) - you deserved it (2109)

On 02/05/2016 at 11:36am - work - by Coccinelle - France

Today, a long standing fantasy was ruined when the only lasting impression from my first threesome was of how good my boyfriend is at giving other guys a blowjob. FML

#21522994
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17819) - you deserved it (6237)

On 02/05/2016 at 4:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my wife and I were having sex when she suddenly stopped and said, "I just thought of a great lesson plan idea for my 3rd graders." This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

#21522820
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18449) - you deserved it (1812)

On 02/04/2016 at 5:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, my parents have deliberately ruined my last 2 relationships, because they want me to get back together with my ex simply because he is my son's dad. Apparently, my son needs his father more than I need a man who won't beat me every time he gets drunk. FML

#21521515
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27544) - you deserved it (1579)

On 01/31/2016 at 4:38pm - work - by anon (woman) - United States

Today, I've been calling my pet snake "Mr. Snake" for two years now. I decided to look up the name, and boy do I regret it. It turns out Mr. Snake is a porn site. I've named my snake after porn and have been introducing him to family with that name for two years. FML

#21521480
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16828) - you deserved it (4099)

On 01/31/2016 at 2:32pm - animals - by GeeLoftus - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I told my grandpa that I want to join the police force. His response: "You wanna lynch some blacks without the jail time, eh?" FML

#21521366
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20169) - you deserved it (2190)

On 01/31/2016 at 3:13am - work - by onlyjuggalos (man) - United States

Today, my dad decided I was too hairy and taught me to shave. This would be a great bonding experience if I weren't a girl. FML

#21521208
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19926) - you deserved it (2090)

On 01/30/2016 at 4:54pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I received a phone call from my boss, from the other side of the country. It seems the conference I sent him to is actually happening next week. FML

#21520233
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18403) - you deserved it (6381)

On 01/27/2016 at 9:44pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up with a pounding headache. My wife tells me that last night I woke up from a nightmare, screaming, tried to run away and knocked myself out running headfirst into the bedroom wall. So she put me back to bed and went back to sleep. FML

#21519974
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20516) - you deserved it (1977)

On 01/27/2016 at 7:02am - health - by oliver (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend moved in with me. I just walked into my kitchen to find my thirty year-old, perfectly seasoned cast iron skillet completely submerged in soapy water in the sink, presumably from last night when he washed the dishes. FML

Today, my new girlfriend's father made good on his "What you do to her I do to you" threat when he took me out for drinks and then drunkenly hit on me. FML

#21518118
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20778) - you deserved it (3018)

On 01/22/2016 at 7:50am - misc - by whattheactualfuck (man) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, I met up with my dad for the first time in 7 years. We planned to go to a nice restaurant but he changed the place we were going to, to Chuck E. Cheese. I'm 18 years old. I waited an hour for him to show up. I then ended up babysitting his daughter the whole time. FML

#21517950
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21553) - you deserved it (1404)

On 01/21/2016 at 8:55pm - kids - by anonymous - United States (Ohio)



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