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mp1998

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mp1998

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 5 April 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 337
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About mp1998 : Love to play ps3

mp1998's page activity

Visits<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 07/03/2013 at 3:44am<b>bosox17</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 10:47pm<b>mattlw</b> - the 04/08/2013 at 8:38am<b>SierraaaNicoleee</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 9:48pm<b>flupsht</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 3:06am

mp1998's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of mp1998's badges

mp1998's favorite FMLs

Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML

#20707414
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42820) - you deserved it (13807)

On 06/05/2013 at 12:03pm - animals - by SHIT-BREATH (man) - United Kingdom (Monmouthshire)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML

#20668913
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47787) - you deserved it (3354)

On 05/17/2013 at 11:52am - misc - by Sonofa - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML

#20667353
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50283) - you deserved it (8705)

On 05/16/2013 at 4:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, the regional manager of my company came out to do some performance reviews. I was so nervous that my palms were sweaty, and when he reached out to shake my hand, I blurted out, "I'm sorry, you made me wet." FML

#20660456
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46834) - you deserved it (8986)

On 05/13/2013 at 8:01am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

#20566988
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20342) - you deserved it (51068)

On 03/30/2013 at 2:17pm - misc - by fuck you dad (man) - Ireland (Monaghan)

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. As I shook her father's hand, he squeezed with an ungodly amount of force, leaned in with a smile, and murmured that my balls will be the next thing he'll crush if his daughter ever complains about me. FML

#20511181
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33927) - you deserved it (5284)

On 02/17/2013 at 7:11pm - love - by daniel55 (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I played an intense paintball match, with me and my friends versus my boyfriend and his buddies. When we won, my boyfriend went mental and said he only lost because of "lag". When I pointed out we weren't in a video game, he reacted by firing a paintball straight into my chest. FML

#20478409
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37209) - you deserved it (5431)

On 01/25/2013 at 5:19pm - health - by LagSwitchFTW (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I took a picture of myself wearing a whipped cream bra with cherry nipples, captioned, "I hope you enjoyed your dinner, now how about some dessert???" I meant to send it to my fiancé. I sent it by mistake to my dad. FML

#20176010
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18378) - you deserved it (44206)

On 11/24/2012 at 12:38am - intimacy - by Whipped Cream - United States (North Carolina)

Today, trying to be kinky while giving my boyfriend a blow job, I whipped him with my ponytail. He was thrilled, until I accidentally head-butted his dick. He curled up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again. FML

#20170605
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13321) - you deserved it (31493)

On 11/20/2012 at 3:43am - intimacy - by kinkicali (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my dad forced me to take part in a pathetic act of revenge against our neighbors, who keep parking their 4x4 in front of our house. He made me stand watch while he kept trying to slash their tires. An hour later, we were waiting for my mom to bail us out of jail. FML

#20092583
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19121) - you deserved it (7323)

On 09/28/2012 at 6:21pm - misc - by GEE, THANKS DAD (woman) - United States

Today, I was swimming with my friends at the local pool. My friend pushed me under, and as I came up for air, my hand stroked a hairy leg. It turns out I had caressed the leg of an old man who had been swimming laps. He spent the next half hour creepily smiling at me. FML

Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML

#19743527
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35714) - you deserved it (5823)

On 06/06/2012 at 10:19am - misc - by Bishop (man) -

Today, I was operating on a young girl, when she began to awaken during the surgery. We quickly put her back under, of course, but now I'm terrified that she'll remember my profuse cursing and get me in the shit with my curmudgeonly killjoy of a boss. FML

#19727538
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20775) - you deserved it (9949)

On 06/03/2012 at 4:27pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37882) - you deserved it (3967) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML

#19592298
372 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30244) - you deserved it (3069)

On 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm - misc - by wtf is wrong with my country (man) - United States



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