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morella_xx

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morella_xx

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1156
  • Number of comments : 325
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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morella_xx's page activity

Visits<b>Machified</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 1:58am<b>Druu</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 10:12pm<b>Nico_di_AngeloX</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:28pm<b>Katthebamf</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 3:06am<b>kjrothgeb29</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 8:28am<b>CaptainNemo</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 11:03am<b>inner_peace</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 11:51am<b>mikester10723</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:40am<b>NickiPLZ</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 4:32am<b>Crazynocatlady</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 8:26am<b>Sweet_Visions</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 8:36pm<b>RageAsNeeded</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 8:46am<b>SandpitNinja</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 12:15am<b>Arni792</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 5:27am<b>Fas4wd</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 7:35am<b>nate025</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 1:25am<b>killthedead</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 6:26pm<b>Metcape</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 5:05pm

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This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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morella_xx's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31048) - you deserved it (14731)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I hooked up with the guy I've liked for a while, even though my friends joked that his large pickup truck meant that he was "compensating" for having a small penis. They were right. Very right. FML

#20876171
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53172) - you deserved it (11579)

On 09/10/2013 at 8:14pm - intimacy - by CityBoysNow - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out I do not have a fast metabolism, I've actually had a tape worm living inside me for 3 years. FML

#20875969
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56303) - you deserved it (3252)

On 09/10/2013 at 5:41pm - health - by Iskylite (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried to get my golden retriever to stand in front of our church for a very short time to illustrate the point of a sermon. When I brought my dog up, he mounted the pastor's leg and began humping him. FML

#20873553
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36251) - you deserved it (8721)

On 09/08/2013 at 9:42pm - animals - by sillydoggy - United States

Today, I had my first date in almost four years. Twenty minutes into our dinner date, I excused myself to use the ladies room. When I came back, not only was he gone, but there was also a security guard waiting to walk me out. I still have no clue why he left or why I got kicked out. FML

#20869864
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45316) - you deserved it (2721)

On 09/06/2013 at 2:42am - love - by thissinglelife (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I collected my new timetable at college only to find I've been dropped from all my classes. I've been listed as deceased. I'm definitely not dead and have no idea how I supposedly died. FML

#20867417
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49026) - you deserved it (2513)

On 09/04/2013 at 11:59am - work - by resurrected - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

#20861263
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43072) - you deserved it (7342)

On 08/31/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by fartz (woman) - United States

Today, my little sister opened a lemonade stand in front of our house. Surprisingly, she actually had a lot of customers, all kids. Two hours or so later, some parents came back complaining and threatening to sue my family. Turns out that what we thought was lemonade was actually beer. FML

Today, it was the day of my wedding. I had a massive headache a couple of hours before the ceremony so I decided to take a nap. I told my brother to wake me up an hour before it started. He forgot. Now everyone thinks I ran out on my wife. FML

#20856967
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45390) - you deserved it (6604)

On 08/27/2013 at 8:23pm - love - by dhskkf (man) - United States

Today, I'm watching a TV show about horrible germs in hotel rooms that you can catch from a bed... while I am stuck in a hotel room... on the bed. FML

#20851748
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37721) - you deserved it (7223)

On 08/24/2013 at 1:28am - health - by HannahBretts - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to a very unpleasant feeling. Apparently, the tattoo I got on my arm a couple of days ago attracted hundreds of ants during its healing process. They were literally carrying away pieces of my skin. I can not get the feeling or image out of my head. FML

#20846451
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53032) - you deserved it (5954)

On 08/20/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by aly55a_mariie (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was verbally abused by a customer at my job. Apparently, wearing "ugly, thick-framed hipster glasses as a fashion statement is a HUGE faux pas." These are my actual prescription glasses, and "faux pas" is not pronounced "fox paws". FML

#20840053
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42380) - you deserved it (3273)

On 08/16/2013 at 7:08am - misc - by hipster glasses - United States

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

#20837021
190 comments

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

#20836718
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54256) - you deserved it (6165)

On 08/14/2013 at 5:11am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dog died. In the same kitchen corner that two of my other dogs have died. I have a "Corner Of Death" in my kitchen. FML

#20833377
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54418) - you deserved it (3409)

On 08/12/2013 at 4:17am - animals - by The Corner Of Death (woman) - United States (Texas)



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