Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

mordecaiandrigby

Search for a member

mordecaiandrigby

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1976
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 27 posted

About mordecaiandrigby : Hi, I'm an opinionated person. Although I'm usually nice, I'm pretty sarcastic. Judging my number of unconfirmed FMLs, apparently my life sucks, but not enough to get an FML confirmed.

mordecaiandrigby's page activity

Visits<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 10:53pm<b>1lesslonelygurl</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 6:23pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 12:51pm<b>MrABomb</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 6:28am<b>weeyin12</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 7:10pm<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 12:51pm<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 9:14pm<b>natalea_rae</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 1:37am<b>inner_peace</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 9:07pm<b>razi1</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 11:02pm<b>mbonzo35</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 1:07am<b>chase5759</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 2:52pm<b>monkeyforehead</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 1:00pm<b>Juicenub</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 5:35am<b>karlcolt45</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 5:05pm<b>Phustercluck</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 10:23am<b>Danielle7994</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 3:31am<b>Ambient25</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 8:53am

mordecaiandrigby's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of mordecaiandrigby's badges

mordecaiandrigby's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a dream about marrying Hitler. I've had this same dream three times now. My subconscious is starting to scare me. FML

#20766565
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45506) - you deserved it (4704)

On 07/06/2013 at 3:11am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went over my girlfriend of 3 months' house for the first time. As we walked through the door, I was greeted by a little girl whose first words to me were, "Are you my daddy?" FML

#20766295
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51741) - you deserved it (4435)

On 07/06/2013 at 12:17am - love - by walker - United States

Today, I was telling my girlfriend about how my parents are flying out to Japan today on vacation. She was shocked at how short the flight will be, because "It's on the other side of the world." We live in the USA, and it seems I'm dating a Flat Earther. FML

#20765797
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36900) - you deserved it (6740)

On 07/05/2013 at 7:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old son apparently practicing his oral sex skills on the crotch of one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML

#20765717
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50947) - you deserved it (4860)

On 07/05/2013 at 6:45pm - kids - by The fuck, junior? (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML

#20765643
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43084) - you deserved it (4689)

On 07/05/2013 at 5:59pm - misc - by -_- (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got home from work early and discovered why my 17-year-old daughter's sprained elbow isn't getting any better after weeks of treatment. She can't stop giving handjobs. FML

#20764944
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66805) - you deserved it (7882)

On 07/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my daughter asked me to get her razors. When my 19-year-old son saw them he asked what they were for, to which my daughter replied, "For my armpits." My son then said, "Girls don't grow armpit hair." FML

#20764467
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44353) - you deserved it (6272)

On 07/05/2013 at 12:59am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I actually had to teach my 9-year-old brother how to pour himself a glass of milk, after he burst out in tears when my sister told him to do it himself. His astonishing ignorance also extends to basic hygiene. FML

#20763424
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36927) - you deserved it (4371)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:27pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, my mother-in-lawyer threatened to sue me unless I took my professional wedding photographs off Facebook as she did not like that they made her look fat. She is over 300 pounds. FML

#20761484
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66546) - you deserved it (4232)

On 07/03/2013 at 11:10am - intimacy - by Nicks - United States (Nevada)

Today, I had the questionable honor of explaining the difference between "your" and "you're" to my boss, and very diplomatically make her see why her poor grasp of language could affect our credibility as a communication agency. I'm Swedish, and English is my third language. She's American. FML

#20761131
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51596) - you deserved it (3311)

On 07/03/2013 at 2:48am - work - by grammarnazi-forareason (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I had the questionable honor of explaining the difference between "your" and "you're" to my boss, and very diplomatically make her see why her poor grasp of language could affect our credibility as a communication agency. I'm Swedish, and English is my third language. She's American. FML

#20761131
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51596) - you deserved it (3311)

On 07/03/2013 at 2:48am - work - by grammarnazi-forareason (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I saw my older sister for the first time in three years. We hadn't spoke since I found out that she was the woman my college boyfriend left me for. Unfortunately, our reunion was fueled by her two-year-old son's desire to meet his dad. My husband. FML

#20760666
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64580) - you deserved it (5181)

On 07/02/2013 at 10:39pm - love - by Jenn (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, "It looks so unnatural." Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out "Men having hair is okay. Women aren't supposed to, though." FML

#20759121
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49912) - you deserved it (12129)

On 07/02/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by yeshehaspornaddiction (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I saw my girlfriend for the first time in weeks. She had a hickey. FML

#20758014
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53476) - you deserved it (5792)

On 07/01/2013 at 2:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: