Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

mordecaiandrigby

Offline (14 hours ago) | Search for a member

mordecaiandrigby

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2309
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 27 posted

About mordecaiandrigby : Hi, I'm an opinionated person. Although I'm usually nice, I'm pretty sarcastic. Judging my number of unconfirmed FMLs, apparently my life sucks, but not enough to get an FML confirmed.

mordecaiandrigby's page activity

Visits<b>kee_breezy32</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 10:15pm<b>lachataigne</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 7:47pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 8:44am<b>shibeep</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 7:50am<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 7:15am<b>morondon000</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 11:58pm<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 10:13pm<b>Ayezed</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 9:42pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 1:24am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 10:53pm<b>1lesslonelygurl</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 6:23pm<b>MrABomb</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 6:28am<b>weeyin12</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 7:10pm<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 9:14pm<b>natalea_rae</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 1:37am<b>inner_peace</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 9:07pm<b>razi1</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 11:02pm<b>mbonzo35</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 1:07am

mordecaiandrigby's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of mordecaiandrigby's badges

mordecaiandrigby's favorite FMLs

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML

#21001045
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51719) - you deserved it (14903)

On 12/22/2013 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my teenage daughter found out that she's pregnant, but insists she's still a virgin. Who does she think knocked her up? God? FML

#20996030
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53852) - you deserved it (7102)

On 12/17/2013 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Egypt

Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML

#20994621
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53045) - you deserved it (2978)

On 12/16/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by confsused - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He seemed thrilled, and went to buy some wine to celebrate. He left 11 hours ago and won't come back. FML

#20991978
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52385) - you deserved it (7285)

On 12/14/2013 at 2:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52995) - you deserved it (2928)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I realized that no matter what I accomplish in life, I'll always be remembered for being the son of a woman so stupid that she claimed she used to be Elvis Presley's mistress. She was still an infant when he died. FML

#20968220
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43257) - you deserved it (2914)

On 11/23/2013 at 6:45pm - misc - by fs (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after having my sinuses draining for a couple days, my ma stopped by for a surprise visit. Upon discovering the trash can full of used tissues, she called my pastor grandfather to talk to me about the chronic masturbation problem I don't have, but that everyone now thinks I have. FML

Today, I was escorted out of a grocery store for beating my boyfriend with a block of cheese. FML

Today, everything that was beautiful and pure in my life turned into a terrible, warped version of what it once was. Today, I lost all hope, and no longer believe that life, although sometimes shitty, is sweet and worth living. Today, I met my mother-in-law. FML

#20949272
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51119) - you deserved it (5307)

On 11/07/2013 at 5:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Derry)

Today, as my wife and I were getting intimate, I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whispered in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. FML

#20946325
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26464) - you deserved it (52882)

On 11/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Something I said? (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was telling my friends a story. I added a few "embellishments" to make it more intense. One my friends piped up with, "I was with you, half of what you just said wasn't true". It's now all over Facebook and I'm known as "The Bullshitter". FML

#20944930
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16125) - you deserved it (64702)

On 11/04/2013 at 6:39am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I sat down with my daughter to have the sex talk, because she recently started seeing a guy. I mentioned at one point how disappointed I would be if she got pregnant. She went wide-eyed and asked, "Didn't mom tell you?" FML

#20942769
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57528) - you deserved it (6011)

On 11/02/2013 at 5:10pm - kids - by unknown (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my 8-year-old came home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole class to write about how they felt when they learned that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML

#20942077
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52789) - you deserved it (5235)

On 11/02/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by SantaClaus - United States (California)

Today, I told the man my girlfriend has been cheating on me with all about her infidelity. He didn't get angry; he just said that he knew, that they were in an open relationship, and that I was pretty stupid to have not figured it out sooner. FML

#20941848
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41178) - you deserved it (5699)

On 11/01/2013 at 9:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: