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moonwing

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moonwing

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 2 December 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 361
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About moonwing : Woof. woof. This is Dallas
I like dogs far more than people and my boyfriend is sweeter than most. bark bark

moonwing's page activity

Visits<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 4:10pm<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 9:31pm<b>hockeyprincess91</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 12:19am<b>tomwantssnow</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 6:12pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 11:05pm<b>TourettesGuyFTW</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 7:15am<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 2:54pm<b>Crystal_Nicole</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 1:50pm<b>daveyyyyh</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 11:01am<b>kbearr21</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 9:21pm<b>SmuggletheBudgie</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 10:37pm<b>M3DIC4T3</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 4:34pm<b>olpally</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 8:03pm<b>daleracer88</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 11:20pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 10:13am<b>iAlissa</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 2:53pm<b>pwmjm</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 7:21am<b>kidsgotastinky</b> - the 06/30/2013 at 2:53am

moonwing's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of moonwing's badges

moonwing's favorite FMLs

Today, after meeting my girlfriend's family and trying my hardest to impress them, she told me that they came up with a nickname for me. My new name is "Matt the Doormat." FML

#20087864
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16786) - you deserved it (2631)

On 09/25/2012 at 8:13am - misc - by oreoblizzard619 (man) - United States

Today, I went out to a club, hoping to score. I'd read about a trick pickup artists use called "negging" and decided to try it out. As I finished complimenting a girl for being brave enough to have not made much of an effort with her makeup, she slammed her knee between my legs. FML

#20062299
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4446) - you deserved it (44733)

On 09/07/2012 at 8:26pm - misc - by scumbag i guess - United States (Texas)

Today, I went out clubbing with a few friends. A cute guy pointed at me from the bar and motioned for me to come over. I was excited and did just that. Turns out he just wanted to ask me if I'd thought about seeing a doctor for my jaundice. No, I just overdid my spray tan. FML

#20055735
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5435) - you deserved it (28064)

On 09/03/2012 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend came over to see me after almost a month of us not spending time together. Unfortunately, he came straight from bar-hopping with his friends and was wasted. He's currently naked in bed, cooing at his penis, and giggling like a little girl. FML

#20044244
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22922) - you deserved it (2965)

On 08/27/2012 at 8:57am - love - by kvdfan (woman) - United States

Today, my pregnant wife broke down in tears over the fact that since moving to Brazil for my job, we don't have regular access to macaroni and cheese. FML

#20032360
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21577) - you deserved it (5548)

On 08/20/2012 at 6:06pm - health - by stupidbullcrêpe (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML

#20008924
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24783) - you deserved it (2401)

On 08/08/2012 at 1:59am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10690) - you deserved it (36785)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I paid a social visit to my grandparents. While we were watching the news, a story came on about the Queen of England. I scoffed, "How is she not dead already? How old is she, anyway?" My grandmother replied, "About my age." Oops. FML

#19910434
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6533) - you deserved it (37009) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/08/2012 at 5:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - France

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

#19877341
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33002) - you deserved it (4780)

On 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my dog was licking the dishes in the dishwasher when his collar got stuck on it. Then he got scared of the dishwasher rack following him and ran away really fast. Now I have no dishes. FML

Today, I couldn't find my hairbrush anywhere; I ended up having to brush my hair with a fork. FML

#19712062
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19254) - you deserved it (6511)

On 05/31/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by jemila (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML

#19710494
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27983) - you deserved it (2710) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm - love - by Monsieur-Madame (man) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)

Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML

#19697677
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23050) - you deserved it (2448)

On 05/29/2012 at 3:54am - health - by sopheeah - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to a party dressed as a zombie. Everyone admired my hilarious "zombie dancing". Those were my regular dance moves. FML

#19602686
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19055) - you deserved it (4543)

On 05/10/2012 at 2:10pm - misc - by tinydancer (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out who my randomly assigned roommate was. Out of 10,000+ people, I just happen to get assigned a girl who threatened to kill me. FML

#19599121
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24250) - you deserved it (1697)

On 05/09/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by roomingwithevil - United States (Wisconsin)



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