moonwing

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moonwing

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 2 December 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 760
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About moonwing : Woof. woof. This is Dallas
I like dogs far more than people. bark bark

moonwing's page activity

Visits<b>FatKitty</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 10:42pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 5:49pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 9:18pm<b>marythecat333</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 4:44am<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 4:10pm<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 9:31pm<b>hockeyprincess91</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 12:19am<b>tomwantssnow</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 6:12pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 11:05pm<b>TourettesGuyFTW</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 7:15am<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 2:54pm<b>Crystal_Nicole</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 1:50pm<b>daveyyyyh</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 11:01am<b>kbearr21</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 9:21pm<b>SmuggletheBudgie</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 10:37pm<b>M3DIC4T3</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 4:34pm<b>olpally</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 8:03pm<b>daleracer88</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 11:20pm

Fucked!<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 11:50pm

moonwing's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of moonwing's badges

moonwing's favorite FMLs

Today, I found my boyfriend's Facebook page. I also found his wife's. FML

by ohokay / 01/23/2013 at 9:59pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I have a very uncomfortable cyst in my armpit and a sprained ankle both on my right side, resulting in me limping and keeping my arm awkwardly plastered to my side. My fiancé keeps walking like me and calling me Igor, saying "Yes, Master" whenever I ask him for something. FML

by Igor / 12/19/2012 at 12:16am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML

by Rhine / 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm / Barbados (Saint Michael) / Love

Today, after meeting my girlfriend's family and trying my hardest to impress them, she told me that they came up with a nickname for me. My new name is "Matt the Doormat." FML

by oreoblizzard619 / 09/25/2012 at 8:13am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went out to a club, hoping to score. I'd read about a trick pickup artists use called "negging" and decided to try it out. As I finished complimenting a girl for being brave enough to have not made much of an effort with her makeup, she slammed her knee between my legs. FML

by scumbag i guess / 09/07/2012 at 8:26pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went out clubbing with a few friends. A cute guy pointed at me from the bar and motioned for me to come over. I was excited and did just that. Turns out he just wanted to ask me if I'd thought about seeing a doctor for my jaundice. No, I just overdid my spray tan. FML

by Anonymous / 09/03/2012 at 1:16pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend came over to see me after almost a month of us not spending time together. Unfortunately, he came straight from bar-hopping with his friends and was wasted. He's currently naked in bed, cooing at his penis, and giggling like a little girl. FML

by kvdfan / 08/27/2012 at 8:57am / United States / Love

Today, my pregnant wife broke down in tears over the fact that since moving to Brazil for my job, we don't have regular access to macaroni and cheese. FML

by stupidbullcrêpe / 08/20/2012 at 6:06pm / Brazil (Sao Paulo) / Health

Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2012 at 1:59am / United States / Animals

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

by Bontempi / 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I paid a social visit to my grandparents. While we were watching the news, a story came on about the Queen of England. I scoffed, "How is she not dead already? How old is she, anyway?" My grandmother replied, "About my age." Oops. FML

by Anonymous / 07/08/2012 at 5:13pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm / Intimacy

Today, my dog was licking the dishes in the dishwasher when his collar got stuck on it. Then he got scared of the dishwasher rack following him and ran away really fast. Now I have no dishes. FML

Today, I couldn't find my hairbrush anywhere; I ended up having to brush my hair with a fork. FML

by jemila / 05/31/2012 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML

by Monsieur-Madame / 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Love