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monster_tamer

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monster_tamer
  • Town/Country : Chapel Hill, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 28 September 1994 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 2567
  • Number of comments : 309
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About monster_tamer : Nothing. Just an average highschooler with a life.

monster_tamer's last visitors

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monster_tamer's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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monster_tamer's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter used the kids potty chair on her own for the first time. Bad: The bucket was not in it so poo hit the floor. Good: she tried to clean it... Bad: with her socks. Good: she decided to clean the socks. Bad: she used the wall. Good: she finally called dad. FML

#5164209
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37199) - you deserved it (3176)

On 09/10/2009 at 3:51am - kids - by Udxero (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were starting to get in the mood. I get on top of him, lean down to kiss him, and he begins to laugh. Puzzled, I ask him why. He tells me that when I'm naked and on top of him, I remind him of a cow, with 'udders' . Offended, I go to get off. 'No no' he protests, 'a SEXY cow'. FML

#4936228
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25968) - you deserved it (3491)

On 08/30/2009 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by sigh (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I told my boyfriend that my fantasy was for him to eat me out on the dinner table. My boyfriend told me his was me in a Pikachu costume. FML

#4921754
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36249) - you deserved it (6501)

On 08/30/2009 at 1:38am - intimacy - by pokie (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

#4882481
338 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54600) - you deserved it (12512)

On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, a friend jokingly asked who in my relationship wears the pants. My girlfriend replied, "I'm not sure, but I've got photos to prove I don't wear the skirt." FML

#4754202
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6704) - you deserved it (22833)

On 08/23/2009 at 2:54am - love - by Crossy (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a friend jokingly asked who in my relationship wears the pants. My girlfriend replied, "I'm not sure, but I've got photos to prove I don't wear the skirt." FML

#4754202
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6704) - you deserved it (22833)

On 08/23/2009 at 2:54am - love - by Crossy (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a friend jokingly asked who in my relationship wears the pants. My girlfriend replied, "I'm not sure, but I've got photos to prove I don't wear the skirt." FML

#4754202
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6704) - you deserved it (22833)

On 08/23/2009 at 2:54am - love - by Crossy (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boss was handing me a list of phone numbers to call people and terminate them from their jobs here at the company. My phone was on that list. I don't know what's worse, not realizing it was my number until I heard my voicemail or getting terminated from my job. FML

#4714930
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28731) - you deserved it (2704)

On 08/21/2009 at 6:12pm - work - by Cally (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. We went inside the theatre and he saw a couple of his friends. Instead of saying hi and coming back to watch the movie with me, he ditched me for them. When I reminded him he was forgetting something, he grabbed the popcorn out of my hands and left. FML

#4603530
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45426) - you deserved it (4210)

On 08/17/2009 at 3:49pm - love - by ditched (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that I was adopted, now my gay brother thinks it's acceptable to tell me that he's always wanted to have sex with me. FML

#4488799
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82987) - you deserved it (3339)

On 08/12/2009 at 11:13pm - intimacy - by JPF (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went with my girlfriend to her parents' house. They told me I smelled of cheap vodka. When I told them I worked in a bio lab and used ethanol a lot, they said I was too stupid to do anything like that. My girlfriend broke up with me because her parents think I'm a drunk. FML

#4479707
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50647) - you deserved it (2130)

On 08/12/2009 at 5:01pm - love - by anonymous (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I was having sex with a girl. She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is, until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading "If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust me, I know." FML

#4329775
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57315) - you deserved it (9129)

On 08/06/2009 at 6:05am - intimacy - by OhFseriously123 (man) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, I borrowed my dad's laptop to type an essay. While I was saving it, I noticed some curious looking files and I opened them. They were rejection letters from all the colleges I had applied to. My dad had been forging them so he wouldn't have to pay for my tuition bills. FML

#4317825
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64508) - you deserved it (1931)

On 08/05/2009 at 8:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



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