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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 3 May 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 917
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About monkeysauce90 : In college to be a nurse. I am a believer in Jesus and Love God with all my heart! I love my friends and family!

monkeysauce90's page activity

Visits<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 10:21am

monkeysauce90's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

monkeysauce90's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2009 at 4:18pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was flirting with a really hot guy at a track meet and I gave him my number. When I asked him what school he went to he replied, "Oh, I don't go to school, We're from the juvenile corrections facility." FML

by Noname / 03/17/2009 at 10:42am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. After three long weeks of him ignoring me and cancelling out on time we were supposed to spend with each other. He looked at me with the most confused look on his face. Then he says ''Are you serious? I was planning the perfect day to ask you to marry me'' FML

by PinkTornado / 03/17/2009 at 10:20am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy