Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

momogal

Search for a member

momogal
  • Town/Country : Tulsa, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 12 February 1988 (26 years)
  • Number of visits : 867
  • Number of comments : 114
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About momogal : 24 years old and living with my uptight, b*tchy, ultra-Christian parents because the economy is so shitty. My life is pretty f*cked up right now. Been divorced for a year from an abusive a**hole and trying to get my life back together. All while having to stay "in the closet" so I don't get kicked out.

momogal's last visitors

AFCCTNevracceptdefeatbriang959BoltTheSuperdoglexxiiik_gilsohishkabibble

momogal's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

See all of momogal's badges

momogal's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to an orchestra concert. Halfway through the performance I had to fart really bad, so I decided to try and sneak it in while the orchestra was playing a loud exciting part. Just as I let it rip, there was a dramatic pause in the music. Everyone heard. FML

#19917515
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12500) - you deserved it (23725)

On 07/10/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Concert Flatulent - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39215) - you deserved it (11945)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I gave the toast at my sister's wedding which was outside. Before I started, the wind blew up my dress and wouldn't let up. Instead of giving my heartfelt speech, I spent five minutes fighting with my dress as 130 people pointed at my floral-printed underwear and laughed loudly. FML

#11511687
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27435) - you deserved it (3841)

On 06/28/2010 at 2:18am - misc - by Kim422 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at work as a musician, sitting on a piano bench. Suddenly I found myself at eye-level with the piano, dumped on the floor by the broken bench, with my legs splayed out. I felt like I picked the wrong day to wear a skirt to work - but the audience members all disagreed. FML

#11326623
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25612) - you deserved it (3678)

On 06/20/2010 at 3:21am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boss fired me because he said I was spending too much time surfing the internet. When I reminded him that my work computer isn't even networked, he said, "Oh, sorry, you're the one who takes too many smoke breaks." When I told him that I don't even smoke, he said, "Just go..." FML

Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML

#7773873
409 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101035) - you deserved it (11753)

On 02/01/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by doesnttastegood (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I pulled out three chips from a bag. There were two round ones, and a skinny one, making it look like a penis. I laughed. I'm 33. FML

#6686658
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6790) - you deserved it (26086)

On 12/09/2009 at 10:24pm - misc - by HarryBeast (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized that you should never teach your 6 year old child how to use the microwave, unless you want to be cleaning melted pet fish for about half an hour. FML

#6554102
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33300) - you deserved it (9539)

On 12/01/2009 at 5:24pm - kids - by poopiemanlol - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my wife got the flu. While she was sleeping, I went out to buy her some soup and other things. When I was walking back through the door, she woke up, thought I was a burglar, and threw the closest thing to her at me. What was it? A cactus. FML

#5775465
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34150) - you deserved it (2142)

On 10/11/2009 at 12:48pm - misc - by prickly (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I discovered that the medicated eye drops I have been taking to fight a mild eye infection show up under black lights when I walked into a party and the whole left side of my face was glowing. FML

#4763685
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25090) - you deserved it (2539)

On 08/23/2009 at 6:24pm - misc - by SummerGirl0009 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was sneaking over to my girlfriend's house. I sent her mother a text message thinking it was my girlfriend saying "There's a stalker coming in to make you his play mate ;]" Unfortunately when I got to her window I was greeted by her dad with a bat. FML

#4454035
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8440) - you deserved it (62891)

On 08/11/2009 at 4:30pm - love - by Ohfman117 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, it was my wedding day. I had my butt clenched during the ceremony. I was giving my husband the ring, but dropped it. When I went to retrieve it, I let a huge one ripe. My husband yelled "she likes to eat beans." FML

#3666100
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48703) - you deserved it (7559)

On 07/11/2009 at 12:41pm - misc - by 1234 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I fell asleep on the bus and when I woke up, I found out that I missed my stop by ten stops and I was on the last bus of the night. And, to make matters worse, a drunk hobo was sitting next to me with a beer in one hand and was rubbing my leg with the other. FML

#3574946
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39161) - you deserved it (8955)

On 07/08/2009 at 3:24am - misc - by feltuponthe69 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom told me I was a bad daughter because I didn't get anything for my parents' anniversary. I just sent my brother a check for $400 for my share of their gift. FML

#3560349
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34910) - you deserved it (2294)

On 07/07/2009 at 6:18pm - misc - by andrie09 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: