mollyjbear23

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mollyjbear23

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1838
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mollyjbear23 : :)

mollyjbear23's page activity

Visits<b>connorgrant98</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 6:23pm<b>Liiiiiiiiike</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 8:12am<b>Aferg15</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 1:37am<b>qwertydude1</b> - the 03/22/2013 at 11:45am<b>KiddNYC1O</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 2:37pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 03/13/2013 at 9:52pm<b>Blee864</b> - the 03/13/2013 at 8:30am<b>sirpantselot</b> - the 03/13/2013 at 1:13am<b>Gshelton09</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 10:10pm<b>delwoodfrashure</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 2:58pm<b>waffule365</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 2:01pm<b>martinez121797</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 6:03pm<b>coleiab125</b> - the 02/28/2013 at 10:32pm<b>crystaljayde</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 1:26am<b>jskains</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 10:23pm<b>Kidkaplan</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 10:17pm<b>ROSI3TH3CAT</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 2:47pm<b>botanistjessica</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 10:24am

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50 favourites

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mollyjbear23's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up and went into my living room, only to be greeted by my aunt, sister, and mother watching a very graphic video showing women giving birth. They forced me to stay and watch it until the end. It was almost 90 minutes. FML

by dafuqdidisee / 05/19/2013 at 2:30am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML

by Mr_poole / 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML

by -1 friend / 05/17/2013 at 5:16pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, while on an escalator, instead of just telling me my underwear label was hanging out of my jeans, a woman behind me decided to tuck the label in herself. You should never have to feel a stranger's finger on your butt crack. FML

by violatedbuttcrack / 05/16/2013 at 6:24am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I posted a Facebook status about how I hoped to spend the rest of my life with my boyfriend. A couple of hours later, I saw a comment on it saying he'd never done anything bad enough to deserve that kind of torment. Thanks, mom. FML

by lackadaisy_leah / 05/15/2013 at 12:12pm / United States / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was babysitting a 4-year-old, and we decided to play a game of hide and seek. Before he started to count, he looked me straight in the eyes and said that if I hid in his spot, he'd murder me with a knife when he grows up. I have to babysit this kid for the rest of the summer. FML

by sumhub94 / 05/14/2013 at 12:48pm / United States / Work

Today, I discovered that the "dish soap" my sister uses to clean our dishes when it's her turn, is actually a semi-toxic floor cleaner. FML

by emmingle / 05/13/2013 at 7:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my friend stroking my face with the bottom of his foot and whispering, "Shh, you're okay." FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 6:05pm / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous

Today, our cat died. My five-year-old tried to flush him down the toilet. FML

by JamiesMom / 05/13/2013 at 12:29am / United States (Michigan) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while driving my grandma home from a family dinner, I had to pull into a gas station, because my tank was almost empty. She became convinced that someone would kidnap her while I went to pay, and eventually threatened to blow us up by tossing her lighter at the gas pumps. FML

by fuckingjesusgran / 05/07/2013 at 6:13pm / Bosnia and Herzegovina (Federation of Bosnia and Herzego) / Transportation

Today, it's my 17th birthday. The only person who remembered was the creepy guy in my English class who keeps trying to smell my hair. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2013 at 11:34am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2013 at 12:11am / United States / Intimacy

Today, things got pretty steamy between my boyfriend and me. We started doing stuff that neither of us had tried before. Then, he straddled me with a raging erection and boomed, "IT HAS RISEN!" He didn't understand why I was suddenly no longer in the mood. FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2013 at 6:22pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, while he was eating chicken, one of my friends asked me why I'm a vegetarian. I responded that I believe in animal rights and don't like the conditions the animals are forced to live in. He looked at me incredulously before explaining that "chickens aren't animals, they're birds." FML

by revan546 / 04/26/2013 at 9:23am / United States (New Hampshire) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous