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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
ml_augustus's favorite FMLs
by not a shitty situation so fuck you / 06/24/2016 at 6:52pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by tracy4191 / 06/13/2016 at 11:27am / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/03/2016 at 3:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, a woman kindly asked if she might take a photo of her son in our cowboy boots. Thinking it couldn't do much harm, I agreed. Ten minutes later there was a butt naked three year-old and his entire family taking pictures in my shoe store. My manager wasn't impressed. FML
by jasonvanr / 05/10/2016 at 4:19am / South Africa (Gauteng) / Work
Today, some guy on a bike kept taunting me about my weight while I was out jogging. He ended up hitting a street lamp and fell off his bike. I had a real good laugh at him for all of 5 seconds before he got mad and really made me run. FML
by Anonymous / 04/29/2016 at 1:59pm / United States / Health
Today, I celebrated my friend's birthday. While everyone was completely wasted, a couple of friends suggested that I throw a pie in the birthday boy's face. Only seconds after doing so did I realize that the centre of the pie had still been burning hot, since he screamed in agony. FML
by UnluckyLatina / 04/21/2016 at 11:30pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous
by humanshield / 04/10/2016 at 12:49pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
by mommyopps / 03/25/2016 at 10:14pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
Today, at the supermarket, I picked up a pack of toilet rolls, at which point my 5-year-old daughter turned to me and screamed, "A CLEAN BUTTHOLE IS A HAPPY BUTTHOLE!" in front of a dozen other people. I have no idea where she heard that. FML
by humiliated / 03/20/2016 at 7:54am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids
by Anonymous / 03/20/2016 at 2:24am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by NotBeingPaidEnough / 03/03/2016 at 8:17am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work
Today, I walked my girlfriend home. As I kissed her goodbye, I heard a high-pitched scream and turned just in time to see her little brother charge head-first into my nuts. All because I kissed her on the cheek. FML
by Racked / 03/01/2016 at 1:00pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
by madisonnnnnn / 02/12/2016 at 8:38pm / United States (Colorado) / Health
Today, I found my 6-year-old daughter recording herself on her little tape recorder. When I asked her what she was up to, she replied in her cute little voice, "I'm recording myself so you'll have a souvenir when I'm dead." FML
by DarkChild / 02/11/2016 at 5:18pm / France / Kids
by Spooderman / 02/03/2016 at 9:04pm / United States / Kids