miserypoison

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miserypoison

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2535
  • Number of comments : 149
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 45 posted

About miserypoison : If you can't laugh at yourself then I will gladly do it for you!

miserypoison's page activity

Visits<b>buckstop1</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 4:40pm<b>vincentjules</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 9:19pm<b>jagdeep</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 4:21am<b>Role448</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 1:15am<b>Swandive235</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 10:58pm<b>bilboswaggins2</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 11:20pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 7:24pm<b>JayL80</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 4:37am<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 4:16am<b>kianabanannna</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 9:28am<b>Roozb</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 9:51am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 8:22am<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 7:26pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 2:58pm<b>dumbchoices72</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 2:14am<b>xsaladsandwich</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 3:23am<b>Kevinmeowbeanz</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 10:00am<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 5:06pm

Fucked!<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 1:26am

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miserypoison's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML

by Anonymous / 08/01/2011 at 12:28am / United States (Kentucky) / Kids

Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML

by Taylor / 07/30/2011 at 1:14am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I realized the only reason my boyfriend is dating me is because he has a pimple fetish. FML

by Anonymous / 07/30/2011 at 12:35am / United States / Love

Today, I was riding on my bike when I saw a homeless guy holding a sign saying, "Need money, stranded from Oklahoma." I decided to be nice, and hopped off my bike to give him $2. He took the money, and then jacked my bike. FML

by Joe thomas / 07/24/2011 at 12:22am / United States (Florida) / Money

Today, my girlfriend's overprotective parents decided that I'm a bad influence on their daughter. I'm a straight A engineering student who openly speaks out against drugs, alcohol, and discrimination. Their reason? Someone told them I dyed my hair black. They think I'm a "closet Nazi". FML

by rbeast / 07/21/2011 at 12:10am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, my girlfriend's overprotective parents decided that I'm a bad influence on their daughter. I'm a straight A engineering student who openly speaks out against drugs, alcohol, and discrimination. Their reason? Someone told them I dyed my hair black. They think I'm a "closet Nazi". FML

by rbeast / 07/21/2011 at 12:10am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I woke up feeling great. I opened up the blinds and looked out from my window just in time to see a man ripping my mailbox from the ground and sprinting away with it. FML

by cheddar / 07/20/2011 at 6:17pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML

by knolan / 07/20/2011 at 12:40am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I slipped and fell in mud while running from the car to inside to avoid getting wet in a torrential downpour. I was running from the limo, in my wedding dress, to the church for my wedding. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2011 at 12:26am / New Zealand (Wellington) / Love

Today, I told my boyfriend to stop tickling me, since I absolutely hate being tickled. He got extremely pissed at me and left the room. It took me a full five minutes to realize that I'd called him by my ex's name. FML

by sarahbeth93 / 07/20/2011 at 12:07am / United States (Mississippi) / Love

Today, we found out why we were getting notes on our door telling us to "move out or else." As my mom works for the government and we have a direct-TV dish on our roof, our neighbor thinks we were sent to listen to his phone calls and read his mind. We were here before he was. FML

by SonOfaSpy / 07/17/2011 at 9:51pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I forced myself into work with severe laryngitis. Normally this wouldn't be an issue, except I work at candy and ice cream store at a major tourist destination. For seven hours I had to communicate with unsympathetic adults and screaming, bratty kids by miming and using a dry erase board. FML

by Anonymous / 07/17/2011 at 7:29pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, after running a couple of miles, I went upstairs into my air-conditioned room to cool off. Apparently, my mom walked past my room and heard me breathing heavily. Later, she had my dad give me a talk about masturbation. FML

by chumleevil / 07/08/2011 at 12:20am / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, I finally went to the bathroom after being constipated for two days. The good news? I lost two pounds. The bad news? The toilet won't flush. FML

by Me / 06/20/2011 at 12:14pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, I found out my mom has notebooks with lists of everything she has bought for me ever since I was born. Apparently she is going to make me pay her back for all the money she spent on me once I'm an adult. FML

by Anonymous / 06/08/2011 at 12:35am / United States (California) / Money