Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

miraclewhip94

Offline (2 hours ago) | Search for a member

miraclewhip94

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 September 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 170
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About miraclewhip94 : just a simple Canadian girl

miraclewhip94's page activity

Visits<b>FunnyDude1215</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 2:02am<b>Abdelhady</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 8:36pm<b>guriak</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 8:50pm<b>firefighterbee</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 3:14am<b>XPiemaster</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 1:56am<b>bulldogs220</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 9:46am<b>four0seven</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 1:23am<b>pmnj19</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 8:22pm<b>awiseman</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 4:48pm<b>Red_Brooks</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 2:04pm<b>mimixia</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 6:41am<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 10:49pm<b>forizidrizzi</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 5:07pm<b>AGB10</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 1:38pm<b>yamzie47</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 10:18am<b>lifesentence</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 9:38am<b>aamir251</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 8:57am<b>Dramori</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 8:22am

miraclewhip94's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of miraclewhip94's badges

miraclewhip94's favorite FMLs

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

#20757332
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53937) - you deserved it (3461)

On 07/01/2013 at 1:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dad watched his first Lord of the Rings marathon. Now he keeps spouting lines from the movies, and thought it'd be funny to hide in my closet, just to jump out at me while screaming, "My precious!" FML

#20701776
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43079) - you deserved it (6990)

On 06/02/2013 at 6:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Thurrock)

Today, my sister was crying to me about how her boyfriend never showed up for their date. He's done this many times before, so I suggested the fact that maybe he'd just ditched her. She said that was ridiculous, because "he's Canadian" and according to her, "they don't lie." FML

#20621115
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44471) - you deserved it (4974)

On 04/25/2013 at 4:36pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

#20613218
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50326) - you deserved it (8160)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I posted a video of a dance I choreographed on Facebook. I got a notification a few hours later telling me that my grandpa had also shared it. His caption? "My granddaughter dances like a gay baboon and this dance sucks balls. Throw grapes at her." Thanks grandpa. FML

#20604301
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48146) - you deserved it (9258)

On 04/19/2013 at 3:27am - misc - by thanks gramps - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, my boyfriend made me play Slender. I was so terrified, I stopped playing 10 minutes in. Tonight, I kept hearing noises outside. When I peered out through the window, a bald figure in a suit was staring back at me. I shrieked in absolute terror; he burst out laughing. It was my boyfriend. FML

#20520443
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33243) - you deserved it (4972)

On 02/24/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by stillfuckingcrying (woman) - Sweden (Kalmar Lan)

Today, I felt frisky, so I did my hair and put on make-up and some lingerie. I walked into the living room, where my husband was playing a video game. He glanced up, said, "Oh, for fuck's sake." and made me wait nearly 15 minutes for him to reach a save-game point. FML

#20506870
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36313) - you deserved it (8090)

On 02/14/2013 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML

#20486562
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47757) - you deserved it (3569) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by dr mamour - Sent from mobile version

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

#20483320
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45546) - you deserved it (5940) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version

Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML

#20402533
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27214) - you deserved it (12873)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by Rhine (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)

Today, the girl I have a crush on came over to work on a project. My dad rushed into the room we were in, farted, and then ran out giggling. FML

#16507836
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51077) - you deserved it (5378)

On 06/05/2011 at 12:14am - love - by longlostkid556 (man) - United States (California)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: