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mimori_kiryu's favorite FMLs
Today, I was flying home to Milwaukee after a weekend in South Carolina. When I got to the airport, my reservation didn't match up with any flights. Turns out Expedia booked me on a flight that doen't exist. I spent ten hours waiting in the airport for a two hour flight. FML
by lojo / 06/17/2009 at 12:02am / United States (Minnesota) / Transportation
Today, my family was discussing the new rules of the house we are moving in. They told my sister she couldn't have any boys in her room. They didn't tell me I couldn't have any girls in my room. Even my parents think I can't get a girlfriend. FML
by FML1994 / 06/14/2009 at 1:20pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out the identity of the pervert who's been staring at me through my bedroom window in the late hours of the night. My parents and I decided to set out a trap for 'him' instead of reporting to our local cop. Turns out, we caught my 37 year-old neighbor in the act. He's the cop. FML
by Meg / 06/13/2009 at 6:46pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, my crush came to my house to watch movies with me. We were sitting on the couch when he turned to me and said that he had had a dream about me the night before. I moved in to kiss him, thinking he liked me. He then added that I had fallen of a cliff and he had pissed himself laughing. FML
by Mojo_Jojo / 06/13/2009 at 7:01am / China (Beijing) / Love
by feeldumb / 06/11/2009 at 12:33am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was playing a medieval game with my brother, when he took all of his character's clothes off and said, "Let's have sex!" I looked at him and said, "UH YOU ARE MY BROTHER!" He turns and looks at me, smiling and says, "But not in the game!" I am a 19 year old girl. He is 12. FML
by Sylvania / 06/10/2009 at 7:07pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
by quadropheniac / 06/09/2009 at 12:18pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
Today, the girl I am in love with invited me to stay with her in Europe for 2 weeks, she is even paying for the flights and accommodation. It's because I am such a special friend to her and she wants me to come up to meet her fiancé before she gets married. FML
by doomed / 06/08/2009 at 9:28pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love
by levit / 06/08/2009 at 3:32am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, I checked my bank account that i've been saving money in since I was a kid for college. I have $100 left out of the $10,000 I had last month. Apparently my parents thought buying a pool and an HDTV for themselves was more important than my college education. FML
by ExtemelyBroke / 06/05/2009 at 10:24pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Money
by Emcee / 06/05/2009 at 6:48am / Philippines (Rizal) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was cleaning my father's study room and wondering why I did not receive my acceptance/rejection letter from a college I really wanted. I found the acceptance letter, on his desk, also approving of a full scholarship. The deadline to confirm was a month ago. FML
by guamfml / 06/02/2009 at 8:10pm / Guam / Miscellaneous
by bluehairedfreakgirl / 05/31/2009 at 11:12pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, we had to have our vet put our horse down. Afterwards we were discussing burial options. We then find the cat with a broken neck. Had to have her put down also. Now we have animal services questioning us for animal abuse. FML
by farmwithnobarn / 05/30/2009 at 1:48am / United States (Florida) / Health
Today, I got my belly button pierced. The guy put a small dot with a sharpie right above the center of my belly button so he knew exactly where to pierce. I also have a small freckle noticeably to the left of center of my belly button. Guess which one he pierced through. FML
by Anonymous / 05/29/2009 at 11:47am / United States (Colorado) / Health
- Today, when i was painting my room after not sleeping for 2 days, I decided to take a nap. After I… Today, I took off my engagement ring to shower (or so I think) because it's too big, considering we… Today, on my first day as a home health care provider, I walked into my first clients house to find…