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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I went grocery shopping. As I was leaning in to pick up some produce, someone viciously slapped me on the butt. I whirled around and nobody was anywhere in sight. Now I'm starting to worry that I'm losing my mind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16781) - you deserved it (1679)
On 04/23/2012 at 6:41pm - misc - by beleria (woman) - United States
Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote: "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement. Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10324) - you deserved it (34336)
On 04/23/2012 at 6:06pm - misc - by pathetic (man) - Poland (Mazowieckie)
Today, I was walking across a pedestrian crossing and waved at the driver of the car who'd stopped, just to say thank you. She stuck her middle finger up at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15454) - you deserved it (2053)
On 04/23/2012 at 9:00am - misc - by hoggypig -
Today, it was my wedding day. With my best friend as the priest, she asked, "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?" After saying I do, she then turned to him and asked, "Do you want to bang my friend?" Everyone laughed, except my already disapproving father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21739) - you deserved it (3610)
On 04/23/2012 at 12:04am - love - by gottalovefriends - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I found out my fiancé has been cheating on me for the past month. The lady he has been seeing is a choreographer that was teaching him how to dance salsa for our wedding rehearsal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23341) - you deserved it (1477)
On 04/22/2012 at 1:20am - love - by Gennifer - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my girlfriend dragged me along to one of her family's paintball matches. Her father is a former marine, and hates my guts. He kept going well out of his way to hunt me down and pump as many rounds into me as possible without causing a scene. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20397) - you deserved it (2985)
On 04/20/2012 at 10:48pm - love - by fuck (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, while looking through my wedding photos, I realised my wife had done a duck face in every single one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31781) - you deserved it (4284)
On 04/19/2012 at 3:46pm - love - by caaarl (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I found out my boyfriend and I have more in common than I thought. We both are sexually attracted to men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32808) - you deserved it (2284)
On 04/18/2012 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by caitlinz5 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28534) - you deserved it (2407)
On 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by lindsaykay - United States
Today, I held up my best friend with a lighter shaped like a gun, and jokingly accused him of sleeping with my wife, only to have him admit that he really did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38217) - you deserved it (3720)
On 04/16/2012 at 4:12am - intimacy - by oface13 (man) - United States
Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45525) - you deserved it (3029)
On 02/01/2012 at 10:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, the vibrator I ordered online was delivered. I'd paid extra to make sure it would be here before the weekend, so I could sneak it into my room while everyone was gone. My dad decided to stay home all day and answer the door ahead of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20342) - you deserved it (5894)
On 01/20/2012 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by Ouch (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I got bored looking at porn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12312) - you deserved it (24007)
On 01/20/2012 at 5:42am - intimacy - by MyHeadHurts (man) - Ireland
Today, my girlfriend hummed the Jeopardy theme while I was trying to undo her bra. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23191) - you deserved it (17393)
On 01/15/2012 at 7:52am - intimacy - by joeshmoe - United States (Washington)
Today, while spending the night at a friend's house, I was woken up by someone kicking me. I figured she was having a nightmare, and since we were sharing a bed, I reached over to wake her up. Turns out it was her boyfriend trying to push me off the bed because they were having sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31442) - you deserved it (2151)
On 01/14/2012 at 6:40pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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