Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

mijzelffan

Search for a member

mijzelffan

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 27 January 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6707
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

mijzelffan's page activity

Visits<b>BunnyRabbit411</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 9:47pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 1:20am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 11:51am<b>smallzz993</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 12:52pm<b>Fireashes250</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 11:11pm<b>solidmego</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 11:08pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:32pm<b>Doortje</b> - the 02/13/2011 at 8:43pm<b>tukker</b> - the 11/15/2009 at 2:02pm<b>ASHLEEBAYBEEx3</b> - the 11/04/2009 at 9:40pm<b>wtfismyfml</b> - the 09/07/2009 at 2:16pm<b>CookieJar</b> - the 07/21/2009 at 5:20pm<b>Meeeheeh</b> - the 07/19/2009 at 9:38am<b>Ajax_4ever</b> - the 07/12/2009 at 7:37am<b>cuterthanuthink</b> - the 07/11/2009 at 5:16pm<b>Mnemic</b> - the 07/11/2009 at 8:09am<b>solitaryspook</b> - the 07/10/2009 at 5:17pm<b>A83</b> - the 07/08/2009 at 11:22am

mijzelffan's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

mijzelffan's favorite FMLs

Today, I heard a student in the class I assist having trouble with a download. I walked over and showed him how to save to his flash drive, and how to use 7z to unzip said file. I then found out I'd just assisted him in downloading a half gig of porn during class. FML

#3608539
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38870) - you deserved it (8714)

On 07/09/2009 at 11:00am - misc - by TingBarter (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, the car in front of me was going slow and I flashed my lights and honked. I floored it and passed the car, flipping off the driver. Just as I went around the next corner I got pulled over by a motorcycle cop. A few seconds later, the guy I flipped off drove by honked and waved. FML

#3583602
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7561) - you deserved it (90482)

On 07/08/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by AmberKCole (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I caught my little brother peeping at my friend getting dressed in the bathroom. When I asked him what he was doing he said "I'm just doing what Ray does to you while you're in the bathroom." Ray is my new step dad. FML

#3563535
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (124264) - you deserved it (4577)

On 07/07/2009 at 8:36pm - intimacy - by Nicole (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 3 years. I got reservations for a romantic dinner, and at the end, fireworks would spell out my proposal. The whole thing had taken weeks to plan out and had cost me a lot of money. She proposed to me at a subway station first. FML

#3561385
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51788) - you deserved it (8209)

On 07/07/2009 at 7:04pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I come home to find my nephew holding pieces of my new $3,500 Sony Video Camera. He told me he threw it out the window because it was a portal for aliens. FML

#3527232
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48523) - you deserved it (3829)

On 07/06/2009 at 2:41pm - misc - by AidenFromSweden (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I sent out my monthly curriculum list to the parents of the kids in my math class so they can see what their children will be learning. I usually end my e-mails with the phrase 'math is power'. Now, 154 parents got an e-mail saying 'meth is power'. FML

#3505255
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40736) - you deserved it (21531)

On 07/05/2009 at 2:16pm - misc - by shit... (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boss told me he is a superhero. He has written countless comics about his crusades and adventures. I make fifty dollars an hour less than him. FML

#3494864
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36358) - you deserved it (3768)

On 07/05/2009 at 12:53am - money - by iloveZELOS (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML

#3446462
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10727) - you deserved it (46453)

On 07/03/2009 at 2:29am - love - by pinkrazrgirl247 - United States

Today, at the restaurant I work at, I gave a man back his change and told him to enjoy the sunny day. He replied by dramatically saying that the sun was his mortal enemy. Thinking he was joking, I asked him if he was a vampire. Turns out he has skin cancer. FML

#3420908
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43191) - you deserved it (14929)

On 07/02/2009 at 4:31am - misc - by Kristache (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my daughter asked me what is the youngest age at which you should start having sex. Being a good mom, I said that she shouldn't have sex until after she's been married. My daughter then said, "Oh... shoot," and walked away. My daughter is twelve. FML

#3344863
471 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71330) - you deserved it (12506)

On 06/29/2009 at 8:40pm - intimacy - by blazer - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

#3229865
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67115) - you deserved it (39341)

On 06/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Jeweler (man) - United States (California)

Today, I enlisted for The Navy because my Boy Scout leader encouraged me. He fought in Korea and is a real inspiration. I asked him what motivated him to join The Navy. He said he was drunk and didn't remember joining until he was called up. FML

#3172918
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34817) - you deserved it (9137)

On 06/24/2009 at 12:37pm - work - by ArmyMan (man) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: