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mijzelffan

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mijzelffan
  • Town/Country : Zoetermeer, The Netherlands
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 27 January 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 6148
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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mijzelffan's favorite FMLs

Today, I was getting mugged. In shock, I said, "Are you mugging me?!" To which the mugger responded, "Duh, do you think I grabbed you for your looks?" FML

#4274462
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42393) - you deserved it (6311)

On 08/04/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went to a bookstore and asked the sales woman,"Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. FML

#4271664
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14462) - you deserved it (37843)

On 08/04/2009 at 12:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a bookstore and asked the sales woman,"Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. FML

#4271664
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14462) - you deserved it (37843)

On 08/04/2009 at 12:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a bookstore and asked the sales woman,"Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. FML

#4271664
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14462) - you deserved it (37843)

On 08/04/2009 at 12:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend came over so that we could have some "fun". It turns out, his idea of foreplay is squishing my breasts together and making them talk. FML

#4113781
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43743) - you deserved it (6254)

On 07/28/2009 at 6:28pm - intimacy - by notsexy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was house sitting by myself and I texted my mom saying how thankful I was that she was trusting me and not checking up on me. That night I threw a party at the house. My mom showed up to check on me because my text was "suspicious". FML

#4105685
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4973) - you deserved it (83737)

On 07/28/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by idiot (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was babysitting some kids and helping them make a poster about insects. They couldn't think of any more insects to add so I suggested a spider, and got told to "not be a dumbass, spiders aren't insects they're arachnids." The girl is six. FML

#4079125
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14331) - you deserved it (38442)

On 07/27/2009 at 12:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out that by brother was selling pictures of me showering. For what? World of warcraft money. FML

#4073449
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58379) - you deserved it (3286)

On 07/27/2009 at 3:32am - misc - by Anon (woman) - Singapore

Today, I found out that my husband made a replica of our family on The Sims 3. I also found out he killed me off a couple weeks ago and made a new wife, KiKi. FML

#4043992
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51646) - you deserved it (4152)

On 07/26/2009 at 12:28am - love - by nosrepamai82 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him I had none, he yelled angrily "who comes to this city without money?" I replied "apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML

#4029321
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39049) - you deserved it (20650)

On 07/25/2009 at 12:39pm - money - by re2K5 (man) - Korea Republic of (Kyongsang-bukto)

Today, my roommate came home and began changing clothes in the same room that my boyfriend and I were in. I quickly got annoyed and angry and when I began questioning her about it she just laughed while saying, "Oh relax, it's not like he's never seen me naked before." FML

#4000083
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50641) - you deserved it (3131)

On 07/24/2009 at 5:04am - love - by Sally (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML

#3991086
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50873) - you deserved it (21110)

On 07/23/2009 at 10:26pm - love - by Ella (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend of eight years explained to me that the Egyptian pyramids were built by aliens from Mars. I have a B.S. in Biology and an M.S. in Anthropology, and I am working on my Ph.D. She thinks I'm an irrational idiot for telling her she is wrong. FML

#3970394
345 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38649) - you deserved it (7673)

On 07/23/2009 at 2:13am - work - by published_anthropologist (man) - United States

Today, my coworkers decided to play a game of "Who Can Piss the Boss Off the Most". I opted not to play, but I still won. FML

#3956685
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38369) - you deserved it (3886)

On 07/22/2009 at 5:09pm - work - by PokeTheBear (man) - Canada

Today, I was performing in the musical 'Cabaret'. I was playing a Nazi soldier, swastika armband and all. Someone thought it would be funny to take my real clothes while I was on stage. I had to walk a mile back my house with my costume on. Someone threw eggs at me. FML

#3939096
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41008) - you deserved it (3768)

On 07/21/2009 at 8:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)



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