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This member hasn't filled in the description.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, when I got home, I went into my room to find a Bratz doll and a Ken doll laying naked, on top of each other on my bed. Attached to them was a note that stated, "Please, use your imagination and find other ways besides porn to get excited. The computer keeps getting viruses. Love, Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12687) - you deserved it (34945)
On 11/21/2010 at 6:43pm - intimacy - by sydysyd (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I shadowed an ultrasound technician for my future career. She did an ultrasound on me to show me how to do the job. I found out I was pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33747) - you deserved it (7989)
On 11/16/2010 at 10:34am - misc - by nicolette5785452 - United States (Ohio)
Today, my daughter came up to me crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she told me that she had a fight with her imaginary boyfriend. She's 16. I raised this child. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30799) - you deserved it (7498)
On 10/30/2010 at 1:07am - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Taranaki)
Today, my four year old told my mother-in-law that our house is haunted because she hears a ghost at night saying "oh" and daddy's name as if they're hurt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20286) - you deserved it (12043)
On 08/06/2010 at 10:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, when my girlfriend woke me up, she said, "I just had the sexiest dream." Thinking she was feeling frisky, I started to try to fool around with her. She pulled away and said, "Well it wasn't about YOU." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27060) - you deserved it (3805)
On 07/25/2010 at 7:09am - intimacy - by girlgirlinsanity (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4712) - you deserved it (36909)
On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend came to my workplace and presented me with a lock of his hair. His pubic hair that he'd just cut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13325) - you deserved it (1769)
On 02/21/2010 at 3:32am - intimacy - by emih (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was late to dinner with my anal-retentive parents because my boyfriend was too busy making cock puppets in the shower to get ready to go. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7974) - you deserved it (1710)
On 02/16/2010 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by tacolove69 - United States (California)
Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18645) - you deserved it (4877)
On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19313) - you deserved it (3441)
On 09/16/2009 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML
I agree, your life sucks (109503) - you deserved it (8693)
On 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (84480) - you deserved it (17444)
On 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm - love - by mandy (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (74624) - you deserved it (4457)
On 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by gbhlaughingstock (man) - United States
Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43540) - you deserved it (10411)
On 07/27/2009 at 1:06am - intimacy - by fmysexlife (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
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