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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 4 October 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 743
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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michelledoogles's page activity

Visits<b>haylburg</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 7:46am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 5:07am<b>Polkadot_492</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 10:06am<b>carry_on</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 5:33am<b>oj101</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 4:58am

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michelledoogles's favorite FMLs

Today, during dinner, my mum asked why I've been so upset recently, so I just admitted it was because my girlfriend had cheated on me. At some point during my venting, I asked why this stuff always seems to happen to me. My dad looked up from his plate and said, "Probably karma." FML

by moronforadad / 01/04/2013 at 9:04pm / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML

by lonely dreams / 01/01/2013 at 12:26pm / United States (Nevada) / Intimacy

Today, my dad asked me when I was going to start looking for a job. Jokingly, I told him next year. He got pissed, started to yell, then realized Tuesday is New Year's Day and grounded me for "being a dumbass." FML

by BAMN2187 / 12/30/2012 at 10:51pm / United States / Work

Today, I had an amazing orgasm. So great that the shortness of breath triggered an extreme asthma attack. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 9:45pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, I went to church for the first time in my life. They had a Jesus statue at the altar, and I noticed he was surprisingly muscular. Ten minutes later, I had to excuse myself, after I caught myself fantasizing over a crucified Jesus. FML

by Weirdo / 12/30/2012 at 1:39pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 1:29am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, at the hospital I work at, I had to deliver my best friend's baby. I later found out that my ex boyfriend was the father. Normally this wouldn't faze me, but it did because we broke up last month. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2012 at 3:25am / United States (Wisconsin) / Work

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

by ELparano / 12/28/2012 at 8:21pm / Canada / Transportation

Today, I set up a spy cam in my room to find out which one of my pervy brothers has been using my computer to watch porn. Turns out it was actually my father. I now have a video of him sitting in my chair masturbating, and I can't get it out of my head. FML

by Anonymous / 12/28/2012 at 2:05pm / Malaysia (Selangor) / Miscellaneous

Today, while my girlfriend was playing a game on my phone, an unknown number sent me a nude picture and the words "Miss you, baby." This person's mistake just cost me a black eye, and probably my relationship too. FML

by Anonymous / 12/28/2012 at 12:33pm / United States / Love

Today, as every day for the past few weeks, my husband won't have sex. His reason? We've decided to have a baby, and he reckons that the longer he waits, the more competition there will be between his sperm and thus the better the result will be. FML

by Bouh / 12/26/2012 at 11:04pm / Love

Today, my extended family came over for Christmas. I forgot to get a present for my extremely sensitive aunt. I took a gift from my re-gift pile and wrapped it quickly. Little did I remember that it was the same gift she gave me last year. She noticed. FML

by Christmasloverandstuff / 12/25/2012 at 12:45pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend put my phone number on Craigslist. I still can't find the ad, but obviously everyone else can because I still haven't stopped receiving naked pictures. FML

by Chanman1924 / 12/24/2012 at 4:06pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

by anonymaiacciu / 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm / France / Intimacy

Today, I was listening to a local radio station, and they did a segment called "food porn." As they were sexually describing various types of food, I actually found myself getting turned on over a pizza. FML

by Anonymous / 12/21/2012 at 12:24pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy