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michael_9310

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michael_9310
  • Town/Country : Montreal, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 April 1993 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 288
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Today, I spotted my neighbour's cat sitting on their front garden. I bent over and began walking towards it with my hand out saying, "Hello pussycat". I was only a few feet away when I realised I was talking to a white bag of sand. I turned to see my family in hysterics. FML

#4806587 (103)

I agree, your life sucks (8736) - you deserved it (25694)

On 08/25/2009 at 7:40am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, as I got into an elevator, I spotted a little old lady hobbling desperately to get on. I frantically tapped on the 'door open' button but the doors closed. I got dirty looks from the people in the lift, only then did I realise I had frantically tapped the 'door close' button instead. FML

#4805621 (115)

I agree, your life sucks (17606) - you deserved it (20781)

On 08/25/2009 at 5:17am - misc - by ElevatorThug (man) - Singapore

Today, I woke up to the sounds of birds singing, the smell of butter pancakes in the air and thought to myself "Wow, today is going to be great day. I can feel it!" Excited, I jumped out of my bed and threw open the door to see my 58 year old mother doing her morning stretches in the nude. FML

#4803979 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (33851) - you deserved it (2791)

On 08/25/2009 at 2:47am - animals - by MrMagicMan000 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had my friend Mark over for dinner. My Dad asked him what his dad did for a living. We all squirmed a bit when he told us that his dad died last year. We all went about finishing our meal when suddenly my dad says: "I'm sorry, Mark, what did you say your dad did for a living again?" FML

#4801141 (82)

I agree, your life sucks (41795) - you deserved it (1861)

On 08/25/2009 at 12:40am - misc - by youzabadgirl12 - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I got a new cell phone. I was texting pictures from my old phone to my new one, including several dirty ones, when I noticed I wasn't receiving any of them on the new phone. I was texting the wrong number. FML

#4792669 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (8155) - you deserved it (40202)

On 08/24/2009 at 7:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was flirting with this guy that had been forced to be my lab partner for class. He was really funny and attractive, too. In the middle of our conversation he said "You're so cute! You remind me of my boyfriend!" FML

#4789258 (53)

I agree, your life sucks (32816) - you deserved it (5006)

On 08/24/2009 at 5:27pm - love - by NotCuteEnough (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, when I opened the door to my room at night, I saw this big menacing thing staring right at me. I gasped and my heart started racing. I apprehensively turned on the lights, and I realized that it was the semi-deflated Spongebob balloon that has been in my room for weeks. FML

#4753654 (76)

I agree, your life sucks (4820) - you deserved it (19387)

On 08/23/2009 at 2:19am - misc - by Scared - United States (Washington)

Today, it was my birthday. My parents came into my room at 12:01 to surprise me. Do you know what fifteen year olds do at midnight? FML

#4734669 (427)

I agree, your life sucks (35508) - you deserved it (16214)

On 08/22/2009 at 12:25pm - misc - by urmommmm (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my husband came home from shopping with my 4 year old daughter and showed me a shirt she picked out herself. The shirt read "My mom's easy i'm living proof." Apparently she just liked the colours and her father agreed. FML

#4730526 (92)

I agree, your life sucks (26806) - you deserved it (2805)

On 08/22/2009 at 5:29am - kids - by naughtyshirt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I decided to smoke in my car on the way to school. As I went to ash it out the window, one of the embers flew back into car landing in my eye. Turns out the excruciating pain was my contact lense melting to my cornea. FML

#4730383 (314)

I agree, your life sucks (12583) - you deserved it (40640)

On 08/22/2009 at 5:10am - misc - by Shootme (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I decided to cook dinner for my wife and kid. After a long day of preperation and cooking I asked them what they thought of it. My 12 year old son then says, "I would say it tastes like shit but not even shit tastes this bad!" My wife then laughed and gave him a high-five. FML

#4728013 (155)

I agree, your life sucks (30590) - you deserved it (3724)

On 08/22/2009 at 2:29am - kids - by NoCookForYou (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML

#4679110 (350)

I agree, your life sucks (35429) - you deserved it (99709)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I wore the new bathing suit my boyfriend got me for my birthday to a family reunion pool party. Turns out, it was a gag gift that dissolves after 3 minutes in water. FML

#4550817 (213)

I agree, your life sucks (61536) - you deserved it (4793)

On 08/15/2009 at 3:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I bought a freezer mug that looks like it's full of water. I've been playing tricks on my friends by throwing the empty cup at them. After doing this a few dozen times, my 83 year-old mother came to visit. I played the same trick on her. The joke's on me. My Dad filled the cup. FML

#4495233 (131)

I agree, your life sucks (5746) - you deserved it (45760)

On 08/13/2009 at 3:27am - misc - by oldtexas (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was at a clothing store. I tried on a dress, but decided it was too much for me. Taking it off, I realize my hair was tangled in the big security button. The employees had to bring me to the front of the store, lay me on the counter, and take the button out in front of a laughing crowd. FML

#4483949 (63)

I agree, your life sucks (31408) - you deserved it (2679)

On 08/12/2009 at 8:10pm - misc - by ForeverEmbarrassed (woman) - United States (California)



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