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metheonlyb

Offline (the 10/20/2014 at 4:49am) | Search for a member

metheonlyb

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 28 November 1988 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15742
  • Number of comments : 196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About metheonlyb : My life is pretty much an FML. But if you want to know more Kik me @ metheonlyb. And girls, if you check my profile out, be assured that I will come and check yours too. Just out of curiosity. :P

metheonlyb's page activity

Visits<b>abattior</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 10:57pm<b>officialwestl55</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 10:56pm<b>WeChaseClouds</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 1:52am<b>jazmin3012</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 9:04pm<b>shesalynx</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 11:23am<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 4:46pm<b>Ley135</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 1:49pm<b>leopardwilliam</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 11:51pm<b>garage</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 3:15pm<b>akachikibaba</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 12:14pm<b>JustJumped</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 6:37pm<b>shadyladyhh</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 2:10am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 12:38pm<b>Dabeli</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 11:15pm<b>DepartmentStore</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 10:27pm<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 12:00pm<b>helloyesno</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 11:39pm<b>markcallanan_</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 4:06am

metheonlyb's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of metheonlyb's badges

metheonlyb's favorite FMLs

Today, I was riding on the back of my dad's motorcycle. After a few minutes, the vibrations from the engine became way too much for me and I couldn't control myself. I had such an intense orgasm, sitting right behind my father, with my arms around his waist. FML

#3192725
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83171) - you deserved it (14207)

On 06/25/2009 at 12:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was sitting next to this cute guy on an airplane who I had started talking to. There was still an empty seat between us and it seemed like there weren't any more passengers boarding the plane. I then asked out loud, "I wonder if anyone will sit between us?" He replied "I hope so." FML

#3163713
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41624) - you deserved it (10983)

On 06/24/2009 at 1:10am - misc - by Nutty (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my car was impounded because I never registered it in California after moving here. In order to get it back, I need to register it. In order to register it, I need to pass a CA smog check. In order to pass the smog check, I need my car. FML

#3153262
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51762) - you deserved it (12845)

On 06/23/2009 at 7:05pm - misc - by nicklesg (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at a gas station and I went to the bathroom. Thinking some was already in the bathroom, I waited for ten minutes while people lined up behind me only to find out that it was empty. FML

#3152991
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9916) - you deserved it (46702)

On 06/23/2009 at 6:52pm - misc - by cmac1229 - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I was in the grocery store getting bananas and there was this real hot guy next to me. He said hey beautiful so I smiled. He then asked if I was free on friday night. I smiled and said "yes why do you ask?" He looked up from the bananas and pointed to the bluetooth in his ear. FML

#3093736
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52752) - you deserved it (14819)

On 06/21/2009 at 3:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was riding the bus home from the Verizon store after getting my brand new EnV Touch. I was taking pictures with it when I noticed a woman with very nice boobs. I zoomed in to get a better picture when she looked at me with a disgusted face. The external display was on. FML

#2997013
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6582) - you deserved it (88585)

On 06/18/2009 at 2:12pm - misc - by heythurr234 (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was on the phone with a prospective blind date. He asked me to describe myself so I said that I was fun, attractive and a little chubby but not fat. My 7 year old sister walked up to me and screamed "Jesus doesn't like it when we lie!". FML

#2914098
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48395) - you deserved it (13763)

On 06/15/2009 at 3:11pm - love - by apparentlyugly (woman) - United States

Today, I finally got a chance to try out my vibrator. I've never orgasmed before with a guy, so I thought there was no hope until my friend gave me the vibrator for my birthday. It was going amazing, better than sex. I was literally 2 seconds away from climaxing when the battery suddenly died. FML

#2907219
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70765) - you deserved it (13520)

On 06/15/2009 at 7:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

#2772494
819 comments

I agree, your life sucks (119699) - you deserved it (74039)

On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boss came storming towards me, screaming just how tired she is with my constant bullshit. Already pissed off, I retorted that she's a bitch and should go lose some pounds. Turns out she was talking to her husband on her bluetooth headset. FML

#2147248
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19623) - you deserved it (70078)

On 05/21/2009 at 3:16pm - work - by unemployed (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that my husband named our daughter after his favorite porn star. FML

#1749459
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (138754) - you deserved it (14116)

On 05/08/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by Oblivious (woman) - Kuwait

Today, I realized my wedding ring was missing. Turns out, my son had taken it to give to a girl he likes in the 2nd grade. FML

#1706797
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71660) - you deserved it (8079)

On 05/06/2009 at 11:47pm - kids - by fmal (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, was my first meeting with business partners as I am new to the team. Instead of saying that I was looking forward to "stretching my legs" or "spreading my wings", I told them I was anxious to start "spreading my legs". FML

#1683242
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57391) - you deserved it (19972)

On 05/06/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was about to lose my virginity with my girlfriend of 2 years, when I got an urgent phone call from my 9-year-old sister, telling me I had to come home immediately. My grandma fell off the toilet and got stuck between the bowl and the wall. I'm not making this up. FML

#1604682
314 comments

I agree, your life sucks (271877) - you deserved it (17608)

On 05/03/2009 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my friends and I were celebrating Spring Break by going out to a club. I saw a very, very cute girl sipping a drink at the bar all by herself. Trying to be a stud I walked over and said "What are you doing Friday night?" Her response: "Not you." FML

#1244870
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23813) - you deserved it (74085)

On 04/23/2009 at 12:20am - intimacy - by rejected (man) - United States (Nevada)



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