metheonlyb

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Offline (the 06/11/2016 at 3:57pm)

metheonlyb

5Fucked!

metheonlyb
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 28 November 1988 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 16767
  • Number of comments : 199
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About metheonlyb : My life is pretty much an FML. But if you want to know more just send me a message. And girls, if you check my profile out, be assured that I will come and check yours too. Just out of curiosity. :P

metheonlyb's page activity

Visits<b>ceciliebossow</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 9:10am<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 5:42am<b>swenny_xoxo</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 11:28pm<b>TenebrionHZ</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 4:10pm<b>madissin</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 10:01am<b>Bonngoo</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 11:12pm<b>PopBlox</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 10:41pm<b>Sansational_</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 6:21pm<b>mancuneanway</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 4:02pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 6:00am<b>racerboy102</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 5:55pm<b>Graham_Cracker</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 7:09am<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 1:55am<b>corky1992</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 12:06am<b>oceanic_bluee</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 8:14am<b>Sierra7211</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 4:31am<b>kitkat3308</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 3:39am<b>laurellkawes</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 10:22pm

Fucked!<b>madissin</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 4:01pm<b>Bonngoo</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 5:12am<b>swenny_xoxo</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 5:06pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 8:56pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 5:15pm

metheonlyb's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of metheonlyb's badges

metheonlyb's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my wedding day, and while I was standing next to my husband in front of all of our guests, I was rocking on my heels because I was nervous. I rocked too far and fell backward. My husband didn't come to help me up. He just said at the top of his lungs, "FAIL!" FML

by thefailure / 08/02/2009 at 12:21am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, my wife found out my son masturbated and wanted to send him to counseling. Thinking she was overreacting, I told her I masturbated when I was a teen so he should turn out like me. She began sobbing uncontrollably. FML

by Anonymous / 07/29/2009 at 12:46pm / United States (Vermont) / Intimacy

Today, I just found out my dad got remarried a year ago. The woman is officially living with us, I got to have lunch with her alone today. I found out she is only 22, with a 14 year old little brother. My dad's 47. I'm 17, now with a 14 year old uncle and a mom that can pass for my girlfriend. FML

by Beefballs / 07/29/2009 at 2:22am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I just found out my dad got remarried a year ago. The woman is officially living with us, I got to have lunch with her alone today. I found out she is only 22, with a 14 year old little brother. My dad's 47. I'm 17, now with a 14 year old uncle and a mom that can pass for my girlfriend. FML

by Beefballs / 07/29/2009 at 2:22am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend came over so that we could have some "fun". It turns out, his idea of foreplay is squishing my breasts together and making them talk. FML

by notsexy / 07/28/2009 at 6:28pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML

by fmysexlife / 07/27/2009 at 1:06am / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML

by treegirl / 07/26/2009 at 1:57am / United States / Love

Today, I decided to make a place in my house for my friends to sign called “The Friend Wall." By sign I meant sign, not draw body parts. This afternoon I ate lunch next to a basketball-sized vagina and a monumentally large blue and purple penis. FML

by rbates / 07/25/2009 at 2:32pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to make a place in my house for my friends to sign called “The Friend Wall." By sign I meant sign, not draw body parts. This afternoon I ate lunch next to a basketball-sized vagina and a monumentally large blue and purple penis. FML

by rbates / 07/25/2009 at 2:32pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my family invited a bunch of their friends over for a party. At some point they decided to play some home videos from many years ago. In one of them, I was 7, I said, "Look Mommy! I can make my pee-pee bigger by doing this!" Everyone saw and laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 07/25/2009 at 10:55am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I got a new stainless steel microwave. When we took it out of the package we noticed it was blue and got angry. We were about to return it, but we called in our 12 year old daughter to see what she thought of the microwave. She then took off the blue protective plastic. FML

by BlueBaby123 / 07/25/2009 at 7:30am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was standing by the bed naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opens the door and walks over to me, swinging her hips, wearing pratically nothing. About four feet from me, she trips on the edge of the floor mat, and uses my 'junk' to catch herself. FML

by Gordon / 07/22/2009 at 10:12am / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy

Today, during some previews before the new Harry Potter movie, a guy stood up and led the audience in an enthusiastic and rather successful chant "H-A-R-R-Y!". Minutes later when I attempted to do the same thing, I was pelted with half-full bags of popcorn, freezing sodas, and booing. FML

by Chelsea / 07/20/2009 at 1:54am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend's dad chased me with a baseball bat because he found a pair of my boxers in her room. They were not there because I left them there, they were there because she stole them. FML

by pyrosythan / 07/20/2009 at 1:40am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to the girl I've liked for 2 years. We were assigned partners for a History project so we were going to work on it at my house. When she asked me for directions, I told her I lived on Woodcock Road. She yelled slapped me and stormed off. I was serious. FML

by thicklysettled / 07/20/2009 at 12:04am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love