This member hasn't filled in their description.
mendini's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
mendini's favorite FMLs
Today, I was working at a donation center. I was having a really rough day, so my fiancée dropped me off some cookies. At the end of my shift, the manager told me I couldn't take them home because they were donated and therefore they were "company property." FML
by bingalingading / 03/30/2015 at 4:46pm / United States (Michigan) / Work
by Anonymous / 03/30/2015 at 6:30am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
by cherokeems / 03/26/2015 at 1:44pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love
by iAlissa / 03/13/2015 at 2:36pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, I was elected to learn how to clean the birthing tub at the hospital I work at. Today, I also discovered that while blood doesn't bother me, floating chunks of afterbirth and god knows what else, will cause me to projectile vomit into said tub. Which I still had to clean afterwards. FML
by StomachofTinfoil / 11/23/2014 at 8:59pm / United States (Maine) / Work
Today, I spent nearly an hour helping a customer pick out an engagement ring. I rang him up, picked out a super cute box for the ring, and wished him luck. Later I realized I never put the ring inside the box. FML
by KilledTheMoment / 11/23/2014 at 1:10am / United States (Illinois) / Work
by MissAggravared / 11/19/2014 at 3:27am / United States (Idaho) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/17/2014 at 7:56pm / United States (Indiana) / Love
by LittleRed79 / 11/11/2014 at 3:03am / Canada / Animals
Today, I learned that the house I've been living in and paying rent for the past two months was never advertised as vacant. I learned this when the actual homeowners walked in, and called the police for an "intruder." FML
by Anonymous / 11/03/2014 at 10:54am / United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset) / Money
Today, as I got out the shower, my mom walked in to give me a towel, then quickly covered her eyes and said, "Woah, I almost saw your penis. Good things it's ridiculously small." I had friends over, and I'm pretty sure I'll hear about this for at least the next month. FML
by LolKaleb / 08/26/2014 at 11:02pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Sara777boo / 08/16/2014 at 2:43pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, while taking out the trash, I swung the bag back and forth, which caused it to slide across my leg. An opened aluminum can inside the bag ended up slicing through my calf, causing heavy bleeding. Baked beans sent me to the hospital. FML
by winstonweigand / 08/14/2014 at 6:40pm / United States (Washington) / Health
Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML
by Emliy / 08/01/2014 at 1:06am / United States (Illinois) / Love
by Ballsy427 / 07/25/2014 at 8:05am / United States (Armed Forces Pacific) / Work
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was… Today, my husband of 9 years announced he was gay. He insinuated that he was only able to achieve… Today, I tried to wake my boyfriend up to sex. When I went to touch his penis, he elbowed me in the…