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melpaintbrush

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melpaintbrush
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 7 February 1994 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 120
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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melpaintbrush's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

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melpaintbrush's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom is convinced that my cat is the reincarnation of Vincent van Gogh. Why? He sleeps under my sunflowers and is a ginger tabby cat. FML

#20854246
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30727) - you deserved it (2484)

On 08/25/2013 at 9:16pm - animals - by KatVanGogh (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

#20644821
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61792) - you deserved it (5650)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72293) - you deserved it (3137)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, I decided to be playful and leave my girlfriend flowers and chocolates from an "Anonymous Admirer". She immediately dumped me, saying she couldn't be with someone who "isn't even as romantic as a stranger". Yep, I think I just got dumped for myself. FML

#20616571
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51016) - you deserved it (7285)

On 04/23/2013 at 7:22pm - love - by BestBF - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was DJing on a popular local radio station when a pop-up window appeared on the station's computer. Of all the possible sounds that could have played, it was a girl screaming in pleasure. It went out live on air. FML

#17635803
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25865) - you deserved it (4367)

On 09/01/2011 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by djfail - United States (Hawaii)

Today, we had my school musical. The girls have to wear long skirts. I had a thong on, and while we were dancing the guy behind me stepped on my skirt. It fell to my ankles... the whole audience saw my ass. FML

#6584375
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21889) - you deserved it (13115)

On 12/03/2009 at 2:20pm - misc - by NoName (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I took a girl out I've been seeing for two months on our first real date. I had saved all my money for the week for this. I took her to a beautiful restaurant uptown. She got hammered, hit me and screamed that I would never be as good as "Marshall." FML

#5758524
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36988) - you deserved it (2687)

On 10/10/2009 at 2:06pm - love - by pistonsunshine (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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