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melody309

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melody309

1Liked!

melody309melody309
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2563
  • Number of comments : 136
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About melody309 : Hi! I'm just a college student trying to find her way in the world without drowning in debt. My favorite things in the world are baking, music, All Time Low, psychology, my cat, my family, and my boyfriend. Sometimes I like to dance around my room like I'm 14 and pretend my hair brush is a microphone, and I'm not ashamed.

melody309's page activity

Visits<b>SyLord</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 11:33am<b>shitcreeksurvr</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 6:48pm<b>Raath00</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 1:01am<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 12:04am<b>boricualuv</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 12:42am<b>lungjiao</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 1:25am<b>Brandi_Faith</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 1:00am<b>insanecutie</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 6:41pm<b>2lovelygirls</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 1:57pm<b>bigjake</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 1:03am<b>Xx_DEXIJOKER_xX</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 6:12am<b>hordriss</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 11:28am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 1:48am<b>derp_taco</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 11:29pm<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 7:46am<b>vordhosbn</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 12:58pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 12:37pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 7:17pm

Liked!<b>derp_taco</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 4:29am

melody309's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of melody309's badges

melody309's favorite FMLs

Today, I was laying down with my girlfriend, when she asked me if I'd ever been kicked in the junk. I awkwardly said no, and she replied, "Well maybe that should change." while rubbing my shoulder lovingly. I'm scared. FML

#21027576
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42540) - you deserved it (4590)

On 01/14/2014 at 11:15am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I tried to lose my virginity to my boyfriend of a year. We're almost twenty. In the end, we both chickened out and played Pokémon instead. FML

#21020996
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62029) - you deserved it (26981)

On 01/08/2014 at 12:43am - intimacy - by gottacatchemall (woman) - United States

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, my dog has found a new game he likes. It involves him rolling around on my new bed sheets to build up static electricity and run and poke me with his nose so I get shocked. FML

#21008001
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44423) - you deserved it (5331)

On 12/28/2013 at 3:23am - animals - by honeybunny90 - United States (Texas)

Today, it was safe to say I started sleepwalking again, after I woke up with a mouth filled with soil and a ravaged plant. FML

#20995711
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36665) - you deserved it (3231)

On 12/17/2013 at 10:38am - health - by adventurousnightsbutnotinagoodway (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML

#20981890
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39175) - you deserved it (21763)

On 12/05/2013 at 5:26pm - misc - by possibly a sweater (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to explain to half of my class that yes, my birthday is on the same day as Hitler's, but no, it does not make me a Nazi. FML

#20981261
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40969) - you deserved it (2729)

On 12/05/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by happy birthday to me (woman) - United States

Today, some kids used firecrackers to blow up my mailbox. This is the third time this week. FML

#20961862
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38061) - you deserved it (3326)

On 11/18/2013 at 5:14am - kids - by kids next door - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my mother gave me a bottle of stool softeners as a gift at my baby shower. FML

#20961774
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32971) - you deserved it (3618)

On 11/18/2013 at 1:38am - misc - by kb (woman) - United States

Today, my mum staggered home, piss drunk. When I tried to walk her to her room, she shoved me away and cursed at me for being a "goody two-shoes". She then slurred "I fucked your mum", and informed me that my mum is a skank. That's good to know, mum. FML

#20958646
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41717) - you deserved it (2830)

On 11/15/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by mummer11 (woman) - Ireland

Today, everything that was beautiful and pure in my life turned into a terrible, warped version of what it once was. Today, I lost all hope, and no longer believe that life, although sometimes shitty, is sweet and worth living. Today, I met my mother-in-law. FML

#20949272
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52451) - you deserved it (5467)

On 11/07/2013 at 5:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Derry)

Today, I watched as my grandma beat the shit out of my dad at the zoo. FML

#20948659
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45150) - you deserved it (4122)

On 11/07/2013 at 12:52am - misc - by Grandson - United States (California)

Today, I had a panic attack when a huge spider ran over my hand. I screamed, wailed, and killed it with a shoe while shouting. Ten minutes later, police slammed on my door. My neighbor called them, saying it sounded like someone was being murdered. FML

#20943397
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42552) - you deserved it (7635)

On 11/03/2013 at 2:34am - animals - by katchoo (woman) - Denmark

Today, my grandma has been running around the neighborhood, dressed as Bobo the Evil Clown, chasing trick-or-treaters. All I've been able to do is chase after her, and apologize to the terrified children's families. FML

#20941017
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38151) - you deserved it (3377)

On 11/01/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by bobosgonnagetyou - United States (Oregon)



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