mazora

Search for a member

mazora

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2335
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

mazora's page activity

Visits<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 10:19pm

mazora's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

mazora's favorite FMLs

Today, I was riding my long board. A few feet from me an attractive girl was riding one too, in the same direction. We made eye contact right as I slammed into a light pole. She then fell because she was laughing so hard. FML

by TheNerd / 05/11/2011 at 10:01pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I wore a Super Mario Brothers T-shirt to school that showed a picture of Mario with a mushroom above his head. I got suspended for "referencing illegal drugs". FML

by Sola / 05/11/2011 at 12:10am / Geek

Today, I realized the only reason I chose to lose weight is that I can never cross the crosswalk fast enough. FML

by Username / 05/03/2011 at 3:51pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I once again told my son he needed a job and a girlfriend because I simply could not keep him in my house anymore. He yelled, "No, I can do whatever I want!" Then went back to playing video games. He's 38. FML

by oldmama728 / 04/28/2011 at 7:07am / Geek

Today, I was walking home through the slush and snow when a car drove by, soaking me with dirty water. Frustrated, I flipped him off. He then turned around and splashed me again. FML

by lynn777 / 04/04/2011 at 4:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I managed to convince the girl of my dreams to stop being so shy, and put herself out there to get her crush to make a move. It worked. And yet as it turns out, I'm not her crush after all. FML

by heartbroken / 03/29/2011 at 8:15pm / United States / Love

Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML

by dickface / 03/28/2011 at 4:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was waiting for the bus while wearing my FML shirt. A passer-by stopped, stared at me for a moment, and said, "I agree, your life sucks." FML

by Danou / 03/28/2011 at 9:51am / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing with my dog. His bouncy ball rolled under the couch, and I got on my hands and knees to get it. He decided it would be a good chance to hump the shit out of me. FML

by Username / 03/23/2011 at 12:21pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I opened a cupboard and a brick fell on my head. The same brick my mum put up there to "keep it out of the way". FML

by EllieJ / 03/23/2011 at 11:22am / Health

Today, my friends thought it would be hilarious to show me Marley and Me the day right after I had to put down my dog. I had my dog for 11 years. FML

by awesome / 03/22/2011 at 8:18pm / Animals

Today, I went to the doctor for an infection from where a cat bit me while I was sleeping. Where that cat came from and how it got into my bedroom I will never know. FML

by Anonymous / 03/13/2011 at 9:19am / United States (Tennessee) / Animals

Today, I realized that my boss is able to read all the emails my coworker and I send each other. Most of them are about how she is such a shitty boss. FML

by mommyfairy / 03/12/2011 at 3:34am / United States / Work

Today, I had to fake fall down the stairs so my mom would stop texting and actually pay attention to what I was saying. FML

by anonymous / 02/22/2011 at 2:07am / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend found an enormous rose arrangement in the back seat of my car. The flowers were from my fire chief to his wife. I forgot to deliver them. I now have to replace them since my girlfriend thinks I got them for her. The arrangement cost $225. FML

by Dj sMoZ! / 02/15/2011 at 10:30am / Love