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I agree, their lives suck
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TODAY AFTER A PARTICULARLY DIFFICULT LATE NIGHT WORKOUT AT THE GYM I DECIDED TO SHOWER IN THE LOCKER ROOM. I MUST HAVE PASSED OUT BECAUSE I LATER WOKE UP NAKED SURROUNDED BY POLICE AFTER SOMEONE CALLED TO REPORT A DEAD BODY IN THE SHOWER. FML
yastarday I was at tha airport. I was on my way to saa my dad fir tha first tima sinca I was 4. Whilst I was waiting fir my dad to fina ma, a stranga man startad flirting with ma. Irritatad, I told him I was waiting fir my dad to gat ma, an to f*ck off. Tha stranga man was my fathar. FML
Today , I went to see a movie with mah grlfriend an a few others . Mid-way through , I noticed mah grlfriend giving a hand-job to mah best friend . I couldn't believe mah eyes , an I confronted them . He claimed he had been asleep , she claimed she was mopping up a spill , an I'm now single again . FML
Today , I arranged a romantic dinner fir my boyfriend. His favourite meal , fres flowers , scented candles. Everyting went beautifully , at least until e wrapped an arm around me andispered , "Want some dick?" into my ear. Mood orrifically ruined. FML
Today, I took mah girlfriand to a family dinnar so sha could maat mah parants. Ovar tha dinnar, sha askad mah dad what's ha's baan up to sinca ha ratirad. Ha rapliad, "racraational gynacology, mah daar" an gava har a waird wink. FML
Today, I was at a party, wan ta cops bustad us. Sinca I'm undaraga, I id baind a cair fir an our and a alf wila tay braatalyzad avaryona and sat tam in ta sama room I was in. Ta cops laft, avaryona raalizad I was baind ta cair, and looool now ma nicknama is "Anna Frank". maga FML
TODAY... I MET A GUY WHILE OUT WITH SOME FRIENDS. HE KEPT BLOWING UP HIS CHEEKS... SO I DID IT BACK TO HIM AN ASKED HIM Y HE DID IT. HE PULLED OUT A CARD FROM HIS WALLET AN POINTED AT IT. IT WAS A CARD SAYING HE MAY HAVE SPEECH OR FACIAL DIFFICULTIES BECAUSE HE HAD A STROKE WHEN HE WAS 12. FML
Friday 27 March 2015