Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

maxinne

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

maxinne

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 16 January 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2836
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

maxinne's page activity

Visits<b>Crash7777</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 1:25am<b>bitchwhore</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 1:34pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:25pm<b>kosherkraut</b> - the 07/15/2011 at 3:19pm<b>PlasmaVirus</b> - the 06/17/2011 at 9:02pm

maxinne's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of maxinne's badges

maxinne's favorite FMLs

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

#21282836
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19947) - you deserved it (1939)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm - work - by Australian Lifeguard - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

#21276776
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31620) - you deserved it (4456)

On 10/13/2014 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Drafrica (woman) - South Africa

Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML

#21255419
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41921) - you deserved it (11670)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my two-year-old daughter's favourite word is 'No'. After leaving her with my sixteen-year-old brother, she now knows other N words as well. Niet, Nein, Non and Never. Her teenage uncle thinks it's hilarious. FML

#21240415
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35244) - you deserved it (5634)

On 08/18/2014 at 9:26am - kids - by 919191 (woman) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, there are people working in my bathroom. I have the shits. The only place I could think to go was in my cats litter box. I've used it twice and am now contemplating using it a third time. FML

#21220246
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38470) - you deserved it (6617)

On 07/25/2014 at 11:54am - animals - by shewhopoopsinlitterboxes (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after five years of dating, my boyfriend finally proposed to me. The words "just think of the tax breaks" were uttered. FML

#21208167
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40086) - you deserved it (4252)

On 07/13/2014 at 6:36pm - love - by justthinkofyourhand - United States (California)

Today, I was watching adult videos in my apartment. I'm deaf, so I didn't realize my volume was at full blast until I put my hand over the speaker. FML

#21206881
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55431) - you deserved it (10947)

On 07/12/2014 at 10:00am - intimacy - by weeping_angel_ - United States (New York)

Today, I sped off down the road, then realized to my horror that my cat was clinging to the roof of the car. FML

Today, I went to a seamstress to be fitted for my wedding dress and left with a pierced nipple. FML

#21187386
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44738) - you deserved it (5572)

On 06/25/2014 at 12:29am - misc - by pierced. - United States (Nevada)

Today, my wife bought a strap-on. I'm about fifty miles beyond terrified. FML

#21184387
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57390) - you deserved it (7982)

On 06/22/2014 at 4:34pm - intimacy - by possibly fucked (man) - Portugal (Lisboa)

Today, my doctor got my blood test results from the lab. He looked at me gravely and told me I had just weeks left to live. After I started hyperventilating and crying, he burst out laughing and said he was kidding. He then prescribed me some iron tablets and sent me on my way. FML

#21182241
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51025) - you deserved it (5909)

On 06/20/2014 at 7:03pm - health - by legitfile.bat.virus.exe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML

#21158120
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45024) - you deserved it (8457)

On 05/31/2014 at 11:05am - love - by wendtinmypants (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I learned that my daughter was looking for love in all the wrong places, specifically the county jail. FML

Today, at school, I got seated in front of the resident creepy kid that everyone stayed away from. I was pretty relieved to get through most of the class with no incidents, until the bell rang and he tore out a chunk of my hair, yelling "DNA! DNA!" FML

#21153319
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45237) - you deserved it (3748)

On 05/27/2014 at 11:58am - misc - by Laura (woman) - United States

Today, I'm moving. While packing, I realized I hadn't seen my cat in a few hours. I called her and realized she was inside one of the hundreds of boxes in my house. I accidentally packed my cat. FML

#21139824
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41098) - you deserved it (15332)

On 05/14/2014 at 4:43pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: