Full time student, no work atm moment.
Gonna hit College of Music soon :)
Today, I was visiting my girlfriend's house to meet her parents. We were having a nice conversation and her mom then asked "What have you done recently that was great?" I replied without thinking "Your daughter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6781) - you totally deserved it (53021)
On 09/03/2009 at 11:38am - love - by butshewasgreat (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I went to my school to take my yearbook picture. I was wearing a shirt that said ANALOG on the front. When I bent in to take the picture, part of my shirt overlapped itself. Now I'm known as the ANAL kid in the yearbook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27094) - you totally deserved it (10545)
On 09/02/2009 at 5:23pm - misc - by boytoy (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32811) - you totally deserved it (9367)
On 09/02/2009 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I finished my project two weeks early. Now I am being laid off because there is no work to do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34545) - you totally deserved it (2043)
On 07/16/2009 at 8:00am - work - by bowhuntpa (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I learned that when you flush the toilet, the contents do not disappear into oblivion. They show up in your basement when your sewer backs up. And they come in greater numbers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36815) - you totally deserved it (2127)
On 07/16/2009 at 3:26am - misc - by megxox (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my boyfriend called me to break up with me. Immediately after we hung up, I started crying hysterically. I thought I dialed my best friend, and as soon as the line picked up, I yelled, "That motherfucker broke up with me!" My now ex-boyfriend replied, "Yeah, I know I did." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30635) - you totally deserved it (11323)
On 07/10/2009 at 2:47pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was at a second interview for a job that I really need as I got laid off last month. Midway through the interview I went to cross my legs and realized I had on 2 different shoes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23944) - you totally deserved it (12409)
On 07/10/2009 at 11:08am - work - by unemployed (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I'm studying abroad in Russia, and I lost my keys to my dorm room. In the office I asked for a spare and she spoke really fast so I couldn't hear her. Assuming I don't speak Russian, she gets on the phone and calls maintenance saying, "There is this ugly girl about to cry... come fix it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34646) - you totally deserved it (1565)
On 07/10/2009 at 8:50am - misc - by icanunderstand (woman) - Russian Federation (Saint Petersburg City)
Today, it was the premiere of a huge play I've worked on for months. The latest week we've practised a lot, resulting in little sleep. In one of the scenes I'm just lying there pretending to be asleep. Guess who actually fell asleep? FML
I agree, your life sucks (31064) - you totally deserved it (6176)
On 07/10/2009 at 6:09am - misc - by lol123 (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 3 years. I got reservations for a romantic dinner, and at the end, fireworks would spell out my proposal. The whole thing had taken weeks to plan out and had cost me a lot of money. She proposed to me at a subway station first. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35967) - you totally deserved it (5165)
On 07/07/2009 at 7:04pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29797) - you totally deserved it (11054)
On 07/04/2009 at 5:07pm - love - by DutchOven (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my boyfriend returned from a 2 month internship in New York. As I saw him exit the plane, I imagined him running to me and kissing/spinning me around passionately like in movies. He got closer and closer, and as I opened my arms to embrace him, he runs past me saying, "BRB, I GOTTA TAKE A SHIT." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32575) - you totally deserved it (5105)
On 07/04/2009 at 2:07am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I noticed a string was following behind our family cat. After close inspection I realized it was a plastic kite string he partially digested. I had to pull the other three feet of plastic kite tail from his rectum. He purred the entire time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38604) - you totally deserved it (2011)
On 07/03/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by RachelDC (woman) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, I was chatting with an amazing guy online. He was perfect for me. After five hours he told me he loved me and I said it back. So than we decided to trade nudes. I sent mine. Within two seconds my niece calls, laughing her ass off, telling me how weird my birthmark is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7088) - you totally deserved it (54913)
On 07/03/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by Uriah (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I found out my girlfriend is pregnant and then decided to break up with her. Why? We're lesbians. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62780) - you totally deserved it (6050)
On 06/30/2009 at 1:32am - love - by yoyoyo (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
