masterrbASIAN

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masterrbASIAN

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 23 February 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1499
  • Number of comments : 64
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About masterrbASIAN : pardon my swagg; but..i'm amazing & if you're shootin for the stars then just shoot me

masterrbASIAN's page activity

Visits<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 10:28pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:35pm<b>lxclark</b> - the 05/04/2011 at 11:23pm<b></b> - the 01/10/2011 at 11:26pm<b>Youwantwhatnow</b> - the 08/01/2010 at 9:49pm<b>inket</b> - the 07/25/2010 at 5:57pm<b>kpark115</b> - the 07/12/2010 at 8:17am<b>prodigy01</b> - the 06/18/2010 at 5:07am<b>KaylaCrow</b> - the 05/09/2010 at 8:52pm<b>Everlast55</b> - the 05/09/2010 at 10:17am<b>khoppey</b> - the 05/06/2010 at 9:38pm<b>crazysicknasty</b> - the 05/04/2010 at 9:53pm<b>TechieInAZ</b> - the 05/04/2010 at 6:00pm<b>nerdsgetmehot</b> - the 05/04/2010 at 3:37pm<b>srunano</b> - the 05/04/2010 at 4:12am<b>chelseabelsea</b> - the 05/04/2010 at 3:10am<b>lulz1337</b> - the 04/23/2010 at 7:46pm<b>krs500</b> - the 04/20/2010 at 5:06am

masterrbASIAN's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

masterrbASIAN's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter was charged with multiple counts of vandalism and trespassing. It seems she's been sneaking out in the middle of the night, stealing and breaking our neighbors' lawn ornaments. Specifically garden gnomes. FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2011 at 5:22pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I sent a picture to my girlfriend of my erect penis with a quote saying "It's waiting for you." She responded with a picture of her left hand showing her left ring finger with a quote saying "It's waiting for you too." FML

by Anonymous / 12/07/2010 at 1:32pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I spent hours voluntarily decorating my town for Christmas. After a break, I came back to find someone had re-positioned the wooden reindeer to make it look like they were humping. FML

by Anonymous / 12/07/2010 at 1:23am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, it's my 26th birthday. My girlfriend gave me a matchbox car, a glow necklace, and a squirt gun. For her birthday, I bought her a new dress, rented a limo, and took her around to bar hop with her friends. FML

by 1fungi / 12/07/2010 at 12:25am / Love

Today, it was my birthday. The only person that remembered was my creepy stalker. FML

by Anonymous / 11/20/2010 at 12:49am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad planted and "discovered" a pack of cigarettes in my backpack to distract my mom from his gambling problem. FML

by Ginna / 10/29/2010 at 2:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend informed me that since he's doing a project with a girl in his class and carpooling with her in the morning, she'll be sleeping over at his house. FML

by Anonymous / 10/15/2010 at 3:10pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I tried to put my friend's hand in lukewarm water while he was sleeping, to see if he'd pee himself. He woke up and punched me in the face. FML

by Anonymous / 10/12/2010 at 10:09pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I came home from a four day trip. Apparently, my cat thought I was gone for good and is now very unhappy that I'm home. I know this because she has been positioning herself between me and my husband all night, and hisses every time I try to touch him. He thinks it's hilarious. FML

by JLD / 10/11/2010 at 12:34am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, my boyfriend found out I have OCD. When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other or I freak. After I brushed his face with the back of my hand he tackled me to the floor, held me down, and laughed at me while I panicked and tried to touch him with my other hand. FML

by Anonymous / 10/07/2010 at 2:29am / United States (Oregon) / Health

Today, I was on an airplane, riding in first class for the first time in my life. The man next to me turned to me just before takeoff, stared at my chest, and said that he hoped there would be severe turbulence. FML

by huj / 09/25/2010 at 5:49pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, whilst at my awards night, I got a boner, right as it was my turn to accept my award. To avoid a awkward situation, I flipped it up and under my belt. This failed to make the situation any less awkward, because the head of my penis poked out through my shirt, in plain view of the audience. FML

by Anonymous / 09/17/2010 at 2:57am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML

by FYouBoyfriend / 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to try something new and sign up for an online dating service, since I can't meet a decent guy in person. The first guy I talked to told me he used to be in a mental hospital for obsessing over a girl, then told me he would be dreaming of me that night. FML

by CreepedOut / 08/29/2010 at 3:45pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Love

Today, my boyfriend was talking with his friends about how long girls take to get ready (hair, make-up, etc.). I said, "I never spend a long time getting ready..." He then looked at me and said, "maybe you should." FML

by ILoveFML / 08/29/2010 at 10:14am / United States (New York) / Love