About marinaim : I assume you are reading to know about me!
I live in England, I like tea, hunting and tweed.
I'm an extreme technological introvert (I made that up), I'm always in a different mood to the previous day. I'm not good with people. I bite. Hard.
I have a thing for debates, especially political, so if you want to avoid conflict avoid mentioning politics.. or morals.
I'm knowledgable about various things; from natural poisons to preparing game and roadkill to galactical exploration to economics to just plain old assorted facts.
I horse ride, and own four cats, one which has kittens!
My horse is pregnant too actually. Weird coincidence..
I've decided people on fml have no sense of humour. Or maybe, I just have a terrible, twisted one.
Message me! I don't bite (that hard) (My life is a contradiction yes)
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56322) - you deserved it (3356)
On 05/18/2011 at 3:57am - intimacy - by Jackedup (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56322) - you deserved it (3356)
On 05/18/2011 at 3:57am - intimacy - by Jackedup (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was fired from my job. Apparently getting shot is no valid reason to stay home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50597) - you deserved it (3441)
On 04/18/2011 at 11:09am - work - by davka -
Today, I used my hair straightener to attempt to straighten my eyelashes and burned my eyelid. I don't know what's sadder, that fact I thought it would be fun, or that I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't hurt myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7419) - you deserved it (91263)
Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28677) - you deserved it (34813)
On 04/02/2011 at 1:03am - misc - by Toothy (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was eating Campbell's vegetable soup. Halfway through, I started to read the ingredients and found beef broth. I have been a vegetarian for seven years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11112) - you deserved it (37830)
On 02/26/2011 at 7:59pm - misc - by NoMeatFail (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom and took a massive piss. Then I actually woke up, well and truly soaked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23463) - you deserved it (7441)
On 02/24/2011 at 1:29am - misc - by JustADream (man) - United States (California)
Today, I yet again had to explain to my boyfriend how sleeping with another person is cheating. It's been three days, and almost as many fights. He still doesn't get it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23844) - you deserved it (11986)
On 02/14/2011 at 8:45am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40048) - you deserved it (7605)
On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out that it is never, ever a good idea to put a band-aid of any kind on your penis, because eventually you will have to take it off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6363) - you deserved it (35830)
On 02/14/2011 at 12:31am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I got a parking ticket in the mail. I don't have a car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28571) - you deserved it (2205)
On 02/14/2011 at 12:20am - misc - by Roxas (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my sister lost a leg. Immediately after hearing the news, my boyfriend started cracking jokes about getting her a job at IHOP. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39751) - you deserved it (4563)
On 02/11/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by mariet (woman) - United States
Today, to prevent a fistfight at work, I had to mediate a contested debate between two coworkers on what was evidently a very touchy subject: Which is better, the orange creamsicle or the ice cream sandwich? I was the only one to get in trouble for wasting company time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19106) - you deserved it (3666)
On 02/10/2011 at 12:31am - work - by geoduck - United States
Today, I was in class when all of a sudden I was hit in the head by a metal pencil case. My teacher threw it at me to get my attention. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13420) - you deserved it (23428)
On 02/09/2011 at 1:02pm - health - by ouch - United States (Washington)
Today, I was dry-walling a house when my butt started to itch. I bent over to scratch it on a piece of plywood, at which point the client's wife walked in and asked what the fuck I was doing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6232) - you deserved it (19189)
On 02/08/2011 at 2:58am - work - by Shane -
Monday 20 May 2013
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