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mandymonkey7

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mandymonkey7

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 11 July 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1034
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About mandymonkey7 : nope :)

mandymonkey7's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:20pm<b>ilikeboys</b> - the 06/05/2009 at 5:24pm<b>kellybaby123</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 10:41pm

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mandymonkey7's favorite FMLs

Today, I parked downtown for a few minutes to pick up a pizza. As I was getting out of my car, a sketchy guy came up and asked me for $5. I told him to get lost and walked away. I walked back to the lot with my pizza and my car was gone. The sketchy guy was a parking attendent. He had my car towed. FML

#1251625
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12212) - you deserved it (64260)

On 04/23/2009 at 9:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML

#1250407
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52966) - you deserved it (10072)

On 04/23/2009 at 6:45am - misc - by DBR (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I saw a girl I knew from high school at the DMV and she started leaning forward. I thought she was leaning into hug me. So I just began to hug her. She was actually trying to throw something in the garbage. FML

#1250127
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41892) - you deserved it (15739)

On 04/23/2009 at 6:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I pulled over to help a girl with her car. I thought my limited mechanic skills would help look like a hero. She only needed her coolant cap unscrewed. With top down, shirt off, I was confident as I got out of my car. 10 minutes later I left because I couldn't unscrew the f***ing thing. FML

#1249093
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11418) - you deserved it (58435)

On 04/23/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by edhalen (man) - United States

Today, I didn't wear my contacts. Determined to prove to my friends I didn't need them, I read all the signs in sight. I couldn't read a particular one, so I began to walk closer. Suddenly I fell on my face, bruising my cheekbone. The sign said: "Caution: Watch Your Step." FML

#1248987
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12023) - you deserved it (59258)

On 04/23/2009 at 3:36am - misc - by notexactly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friend and I wanted to get some alcohol (we're under 21). We went to a liquor store and asked a random guy to go in and buy us some vodka. After giving him $20, he said he had to go turn off his car, then he'd get us the drinks. He got in his car and drove off, with my $20. FML

#1248718
420 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19039) - you deserved it (234248)

On 04/23/2009 at 3:16am - misc - by danielle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a spray tan for the first time. Naked, I climbed into the booth. When the machine started I became frightened by the loud roar of the spray and couldn't breathe. I pissed myself out of fear. I now have river-like streaks down both legs where the pee washed my tan away. FML

#1246949
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22684) - you deserved it (83784)

On 04/23/2009 at 1:44am - health - by tgstreaks (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I had an appraisal meeting with the Boss. She raved and gushed and told me what a great job I was doing. Then she said "Well done, Eric". Eric is not my name. She froze, opened a new file and told me my actual appraisal, which was the complete opposite of everything she had just said. FML

#1246375
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48400) - you deserved it (5778)

On 04/23/2009 at 1:22am - work - by raynbowsend (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I sang my signature tune at a karaoke bar - What A Wonderful World - and I thought I sounded my best yet. After my performance, I went outside to get some air. Then, I got assaulted in the parking lot and ended up going to the hospital. What a wonderful world indeed. FML

#1245192
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52398) - you deserved it (4954)

On 04/23/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by karaokestar (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my friends and I were celebrating Spring Break by going out to a club. I saw a very, very cute girl sipping a drink at the bar all by herself. Trying to be a stud I walked over and said "What are you doing Friday night?" Her response: "Not you." FML

#1244870
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24016) - you deserved it (74427)

On 04/23/2009 at 12:20am - intimacy - by rejected (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was talking to my hot neighbor. We were in the driveway of her house, and I looked at her car and noticed a hideous dummy. It was fat and just ugly, but I didn't think much of it. I tried to make a joke and asked, "Where did you get that awful thing?" She said, "That's my daughter". FML

#1243795
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10093) - you deserved it (75121)

On 04/22/2009 at 11:11pm - misc - by brob56 (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I thought I heard my little sister playing on my brand new grand piano. Angry, I ran downstairs to stop her. My parents were having sex. On my piano. FML

#800425
347 comments

I agree, your life sucks (288027) - you deserved it (19180)

On 04/04/2009 at 2:15pm - intimacy - by GuitarChick42 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that because of my high blood pressure I can't have sex for one month. My wedding is next weekend and the following two weeks are my honey moon. FML

#771915
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (237922) - you deserved it (24628)

On 04/02/2009 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my fiancé turned 21. I stayed up and took care of him for 3 hours while he puked his guts out. When I FINALLY get him to bed, he jumps up and rips the lid off a plastic container on the floor and pukes in it. It was full of all my yearbooks, baby pictures, and childhood memories. FML

#771501
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (138004) - you deserved it (12486)

On 04/02/2009 at 6:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got on an elevator with a woman and her child. I was the first one on. When she stepped on, the capacity alarm went off. As she left she told her daughter that's why fat people shouldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. She was twice my size. I got called fat by a hippopotamus. FML

#721846
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (180554) - you deserved it (12263)

On 03/31/2009 at 10:17am - health - by warp_routine (woman) - United States (Vermont)



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