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makemeasandwich

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makemeasandwich

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 October 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1683
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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makemeasandwich's page activity

Visits<b>chrisstachon</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 2:04am<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 1:50am<b>Brumbler</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 2:09pm<b>teejaycro</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 11:12am<b>rapidconch</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 2:57am<b>BAWB8879</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 10:47pm<b>StickyPickles</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 2:28pm<b>kiki1705</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 1:25pm<b>jerryj</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 1:11pm<b>facelick</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 5:21pm<b>Lilly2shoes</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 6:08pm<b>Tankkiller308</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 11:45pm<b>doctorlemons</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 4:19pm<b>infected150</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 7:56pm<b>MandyCat484</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 4:11pm<b>Zaketh2112</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 2:11pm<b>kirbz826</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 6:04pm<b>mz_wonderland</b> - the 11/20/2013 at 12:10pm

makemeasandwich's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

makemeasandwich's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43433) - you deserved it (12951)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48380) - you deserved it (15092)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, one of my cousins offered to sell me his mac for a low price. When I got it, I realized it was an old toshiba painted white with an apple sticker on it. My cousin still insists it's a mac. FML

#12612052
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16492) - you deserved it (27926)

On 08/18/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by roflcopter (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she is embarrassed of my real brother. FML

#12524990
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38538) - you deserved it (2699)

On 08/14/2010 at 7:23pm - love - by incestastic - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to an elementary school for volunteer work. I was asked to read to a group of kids during one of the classes. Before I started reading, a girl raised her hand and asked me if I had a boyfriend and if I was single. I asked her why and she said "My daddy wanted to know." I'm 16. FML

#12307637
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32538) - you deserved it (3525)

On 08/04/2010 at 10:40am - misc - by LaRae17 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I got married. During the reception my husband got drunk and told 200+ people that we met at a dingy bar and that we "totally banged" all night. I don't know what's worse, the fact he embarrassed me in front of everyone I know, or if it was that that was not how we met. Not even close. FML

#12231460
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39072) - you deserved it (3644)

On 07/31/2010 at 7:31pm - intimacy - by wtf (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I threw a party at my girlfriend's house before her parents came home from vacation. After the party, I found all of her mom's favorite wine glasses broken. I spent $500 on new glasses, and wrote a huge apology for the party and the damage. She got home and told me that they were already broken. FML

#12198220
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13815) - you deserved it (34021)

On 07/30/2010 at 12:26am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was rubbing my lips against my boyfriend's lips when I said "Your mustache tickles" in a sexy tone. His response was "So does yours." FML

#12161985
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23052) - you deserved it (29305)

On 07/28/2010 at 7:20am - intimacy - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was walking down the street and spotted a man who was about 6 and a half feet tall passing by me. As he passed me, I turned and asked him "How's the weather up there?" He then turned around, spat on me, and replied "Raining." FML

#12099804
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13589) - you deserved it (117243)

On 07/25/2010 at 5:06am - misc - by spriggs (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the mall. While shopping in a store, a woman bumped into me numerous times. Getting annoyed, I turned to her and loudly exclaimed, "Are you blind?!" Turns out she was. FML

#12070882
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10688) - you deserved it (44316)

On 07/23/2010 at 7:47pm - misc - by Not So Smart (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was helping my friend create an online dating profile. When she got her search results, her #1 match was a blonde guy only 10 miles from her. His description: genuine, laid back, and ready for fun. He left off something kind of important. He's already married. To me. FML

#11983627
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101225) - you deserved it (5860)

On 07/19/2010 at 1:36pm - love - by betrayed (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was looking for a parking spot and finally found one. Trying to figure out if the spot was legal, I asked a cop that had pulled up. He said it was fine. I came back 3 hours later to a parking ticket. FML

#11945278
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38413) - you deserved it (3605)

On 07/17/2010 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my 23-year old boyfriend is not talking to me because I bought the regular kind of macaroni and cheese instead of the cartoon kind. FML

#11923673
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34463) - you deserved it (17298)

On 07/16/2010 at 3:45pm - misc - by liz - United States (California)

Today, I bought an "I love my boyfriend" t-shirt so people wouldn't think I'm single. I'm very single. FML

#11886380
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15558) - you deserved it (37302)

On 07/14/2010 at 10:37pm - love - by readytomingle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to buy my Chinese Studies professor a gift from Taiwan. So I bought her a mini-Taiwanese passport that said "Republic of China" on it. As it turns out, it was actually a two-pack of travel condoms. FML

#11873804
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27189) - you deserved it (19258)

On 07/14/2010 at 11:17am - intimacy - by safetyfirst (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)



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