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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42942) - you deserved it (4389)
On 03/18/2010 at 11:22am - health - by human torch - United States
Today, I made heart shaped cookies for my girlfriend. My mom's reaction? "They look like dicks." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11298) - you deserved it (2410)
On 02/14/2010 at 9:16pm - intimacy - by adam - United States (Illinois)
Today, at my school, the student council is trying to raise $5000 for Haiti. They are doing so by playing the song from High School Musical in the hallways and cafeteria everyday until they get the money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28949) - you deserved it (2712)
On 01/27/2010 at 12:07am - misc - by evil - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38446) - you deserved it (5694)
On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my friends thought it would be funny to try and break a watermelon on my head while I was asleep on the couch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21839) - you deserved it (2384)
On 01/14/2010 at 3:46am - misc - by melonhead (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my brother and his friend ambushed me, tied me to a chair, and put a sock in my mouth. My mom found me 10 minutes later, took the sock out, and asked, "Why are you tied to a chair?" I told her what happened. She looked at me, laughed, stuffed the sock back in my mouth, and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27377) - you deserved it (3278)
On 01/13/2010 at 2:36pm - misc - by boundandgagged (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, some drunk dude broke into my house while my parents were out. Scared, I asked him what he wanted, his response was "cookies." FML
I agree, your life sucks (1191) - you deserved it (165)
On 01/10/2010 at 8:10pm - misc - by wowhoopla - Sent from mobile version
Today, I got hit in the face with a piece of bacon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8889) - you deserved it (20782)
On 01/09/2010 at 5:12am - misc - by Face (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was wearing a shirt that had a picture of a squirrel and acorns with a caption reading "Protect Your Nuts". My dad walked up to me, read my shirt, then punched me in the balls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6953) - you deserved it (26150)
On 01/09/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by squirrel (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was working as a cashier and a woman brought up a suitcase. As I was ringing her up I checked inside like I'm supposed to and I very jokingly say, "Look at all the stuff you're stealing." She laughed nervously then hit me in the head with her heavy purse before running out of the store. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22631) - you deserved it (2754)
On 01/08/2010 at 11:35am - work - by WesJaz (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I decided to attach fifteen-pound weights to each foot so I could burn some extra calories while shoveling snow. My dad asked me to move one of the cars in the driveway. When I put my foot on the gas pedal, I couldn't take it off. I ended up hitting my sister and knocking her into a snow bank. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5735) - you deserved it (32958)
On 12/20/2009 at 3:28pm - misc - by Klamp18 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, both of my grandparents died in a car accident. My Mom and Dad thought it would make me feel better to know they were not my real grandparents, because I'm adopted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44380) - you deserved it (1541)
On 12/16/2009 at 2:28am - misc - by barri (man) - Costa Rica (San Jose)
Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7650) - you deserved it (24863)
On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I spent 30 minutes trying to find my glasses. I don't know whats worse, the fact that I was wearing them the whole time, or that my girlfriend played along and helped me look for them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6904) - you deserved it (19852)
On 12/04/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by wobbles (man) - United States (California)
Today, I got pulled over for going 85mph in a 60mph zone on a highway in the Everglades. There were cars passing both the cop and me as I was being pulled over. The cop decided I was easiest to catch since I was the slowest of the bunch even though the other cars were topping 100mph. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25982) - you deserved it (10481)
On 10/19/2009 at 5:12pm - misc - by tracey (woman) - United States (Florida)
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