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maemismile

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maemismile

12Fucked!

maemismile
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 4606
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 39 posted

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maemismile's page activity

Visits<b>JMichael</b> - 19 minutes ago<b>GrumblySphinx</b> - 2 hours ago<b>nrubs11</b> - 5 hours ago<b>Ilikeguitar</b> - 5 hours ago<b>benjamn</b> - 6 hours ago<b>Zaketh2112</b> - 6 hours ago<b>bhfriday</b> - 9 hours ago<b>itsallokaynow</b> - 9 hours ago<b>JayGatsby</b> - 9 hours ago<b>PHP</b> - 10 hours ago<b>ironhead</b> - 11 hours ago<b>S232Flash</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 7:33pm<b>El_Boxeador</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 5:14pm<b>TheBeast26</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 5:11pm<b>sweetgirl89</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 3:27am<b>Jake42100</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 11:06pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 1:11pm<b>A07</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 8:31pm

Fucked!<b>S232Flash</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 1:12pm<b>pipefitter69</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 3:58pm<b>TheBeast26</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 11:12pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 7:11pm<b>wmt1978</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 4:56pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 11:53pm<b>jmon707</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 11:25pm<b>NodakN8V</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 5:16am<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 4:42am<b>saocrates</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 2:12pm<b>bigjake</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 6:43am<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 9:27am

maemismile's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of maemismile's badges

maemismile's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML

#21275111
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35746) - you deserved it (21617)

On 10/10/2014 at 5:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my first compliment in over a year. It was from my gynecologist, saying I have a beautiful cervix. FML

#21275026
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34065) - you deserved it (3264)

On 10/10/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by JulietMarie - United States (New York)

Today, while talking to my boyfriend, I noticed he looked uncomfortable. When I asked what was wrong, he asked when the last time I shaved was. I answered, "I shaved my legs this morning." He shook his head and said, "No, I meant your face." FML

#21274726
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33915) - you deserved it (5131)

On 10/10/2014 at 1:52am - love - by Jasmine (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my teenage daughter asked me to buy her the morning after pill, saying "It's for my acne." FML

#21270394
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35973) - you deserved it (4236)

On 10/03/2014 at 11:08pm - health - by Disappointed -

Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML

#21269654
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30291) - you deserved it (3841)

On 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm - kids - by mykodu - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I heard what sounded like high-pitched feminine moaning coming from my son's room. I knocked and walked in, expecting to catch him red handed with a girl. He'd just beaten his high score on Flappy Bird. FML

#21262395
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35890) - you deserved it (9550)

On 09/21/2014 at 11:33am - intimacy - by royallymessedup - United Kingdom

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

#21262317
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44674) - you deserved it (7031)

On 09/21/2014 at 7:27am - intimacy - by Sinnersinner - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend admitted that she "probably wasn't even sober" when I asked her out and she said yes. Our almost 2-year relationship is the longest drunken mistake ever. FML

#21260142
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35002) - you deserved it (3199)

On 09/17/2014 at 5:22pm - love - by KayEffEh (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband and I broke the news that I'm pregnant. Our 8-year-old son's reactions so far have been crying inconsolably, trying to punch me in the stomach, and swearing that he won't let me give him a brother or sister. FML

#21259449
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37532) - you deserved it (4651)

On 09/16/2014 at 1:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I'm precisely one month away from graduating with a degree in translation for the sole purpose of becoming a state-authorised translator. Today, I also discovered that my government has just decided to abandon the concept of authorisation for translators. FML

#21257358
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39924) - you deserved it (3036)

On 09/13/2014 at 7:03am - work - by stupidgov (woman) - Italy

Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML

#21255419
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42204) - you deserved it (11768)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I got a call about a job interview, saying I was hired. I was ecstatic, until they called me back and said they'd called the wrong applicant. They called again later, saying there'd been a mistake and I really was hired. When I went in to confirm it, they said they'd never heard of me. FML

#21252552
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46410) - you deserved it (2508)

On 09/05/2014 at 6:02pm - work - by almost governmental (woman) - United Kingdom (Peterborough)

Today, my girlfriend got up in the middle of sex saying, "You're taking too long, I'm gonna go make some popcorn." I asked her if she could get me some. She said no. FML

#21251846
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42223) - you deserved it (8370)

On 09/04/2014 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by candy man - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I work at a bakery. As I was putting out some cakes with fruit on top of them, a customer asked me how we get the little hairs to stay on the raspberries, and if we glue them on. FML

#21249886
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34206) - you deserved it (3057)

On 09/01/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by s0728 - United States (Texas)

Today, my 8 year old son asked me why he had to make his bed everyday if he would just use it again. I replied with, "You flush the toilet even though you're going to use it again, right?" He said, "Good point." Now he's not making his bed or flushing the toilet. FML

#21248169
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37863) - you deserved it (9613)

On 08/29/2014 at 10:54pm - kids - by sam_666777 - United States (New York)



Juliette Bubulle's illustrated FML

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  • It's the weekend so let's plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time. Sorry, I was channelling Bill Hicks there. I'll start again. Hi everyone, how are you doing? This week…

Friday 29 May 2015

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