Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

maemismile

Online | Search for a member

maemismile

10Fucked!

maemismile
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 4525
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 38 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

maemismile's page activity

Visits<b>TheBeast26</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 5:11pm<b>sweetgirl89</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 3:27am<b>Jake42100</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 11:06pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 1:11pm<b>A07</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 8:31pm<b>SoliDSt33L</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:49pm<b>wmt1978</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 10:56am<b>cokeman666</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 7:29am<b>srinathmatti</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 12:47am<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 12:42am<b>bruh132</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 11:49pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 5:54pm<b>WipeHour</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 5:52pm<b>jmon707</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 5:25pm<b>gearhead369</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 4:23pm<b>Sarahch</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 3:35pm<b>dextrementor</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 12:43am<b>baseball27LD</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 12:39am

Fucked!<b>TheBeast26</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 11:12pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 7:11pm<b>wmt1978</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 4:56pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 11:53pm<b>jmon707</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 11:25pm<b>NodakN8V</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 5:16am<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 4:42am<b>saocrates</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 2:12pm<b>bigjake</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 6:43am<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 9:27am

maemismile's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of maemismile's badges

maemismile's favorite FMLs

Today, my drinking problem became apparent when my daughter asked for a glass of juice, and I instinctively poured a large glass of scotch instead. FML

#21357563
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14969) - you deserved it (34214)

On 02/16/2015 at 8:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a police car hit my parked vehicle, likely due to icy road conditions. When the officer came over to talk to me, I assumed it was to give me his insurance information. Nope. It was to give me a ticket for 'impeding a police officer'. My car was in my driveway. FML

#21357102
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41541) - you deserved it (2324)

On 02/16/2015 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while working at Subway I joked with a customer asking him if he was going to order in Spanish. The women in front of him began yelling about how I was being racist and told my manager that I needed to be fired. The customer I was joking with was my Spanish teacher. FML

#21356827
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36943) - you deserved it (2610)

On 02/15/2015 at 5:39pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

#21356336
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36674) - you deserved it (5096)

On 02/14/2015 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by jessybear777 - United States (Missouri)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML

#21355947
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30041) - you deserved it (9276)

On 02/14/2015 at 12:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland

Today, someone walking my way started waving. I waved back until I realized he wasn't looking at me. To make things worse, while walking past he said, "Get a fucking friend." FML

#21353961
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34717) - you deserved it (3123)

On 02/11/2015 at 8:39am - misc - by TJFuentes (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I had a big figure skating competition. Many of the girls before me fell or did not execute their jumps correctly. Me? I skated a flawless program. I was placed last because they said I didn't push myself hard enough to the point of falling. FML

#21351174
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38562) - you deserved it (2545)

On 02/06/2015 at 9:35pm - misc - by depressedskatergirl - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, in a desperate attempt to get fired, I sent a sexual love letter to my boss. We're going on our first date tomorrow. FML

#21350765
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19832) - you deserved it (36153)

On 02/06/2015 at 3:06am - work - by fucked - Singapore

Today, in an effort to avoid my school's strict no-gum policy as my teacher made a b-line to me, I swallowed it. By the time the teacher reached me, the gum was on my desk, as well as my breakfast, thanks to my overactive gag reflex. FML

#21350431
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24150) - you deserved it (14057)

On 02/05/2015 at 4:03pm - misc - by gumchuck (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I took a nice relaxing dump at school, in my pants, in the middle of class. FML

#21350418
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31677) - you deserved it (7562)

On 02/05/2015 at 3:42pm - misc - by m33p - United States (California)

Today, my date dropped me off at home and briefly met my parents. As he was leaving he whispered into my ear, "I want to feel the inside of your vagina with the outside of my penis." My parents totally heard. FML

#21349904
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37416) - you deserved it (4236)

On 02/04/2015 at 8:21pm - intimacy - by MIB thingy please... (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my fiancée told me about her new diet. Apparently, she is only going to drink water and tan in a tanning bed so she can photosynthesise. She thinks this will help her lose weight, since she doesn't have to eat anything. I'm dating a dumbass. FML

Today, my boyfriend of 5 days proposed to me at the mall. FML

#21349612
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39220) - you deserved it (3933)

On 02/04/2015 at 11:06am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands

Today, I saw my co-worker write about how awful Muslims were and how the religion is stupid, the hijab is oppressive, and how they're a poison on society. When I questioned them about it, they pretty much said that I didn't know anything and should stop talking. I'm Muslim and a hijabi. FML

#21349339
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32185) - you deserved it (5268)

On 02/03/2015 at 10:13pm - work - by coveredupforfun (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was making out with a girl I've liked for a long time. At one point she stopped kissing me and said, "You kiss like my brother". I sat there dumbstruck as she went back to kissing me. FML

#21349028
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34478) - you deserved it (2335)

On 02/03/2015 at 1:23pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Wyoming)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: