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maconmann

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maconmann
  • Town/Country : North Pole, Tanzania
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4514
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About maconmann : Yo I hear your tryin to be messin with the Vanilla Coke!
I'ma make you choke
I'ma make you look like a joke!
Cause your broke!
Son,
I gotcha on a sticky bun!
The one with the honey,
CAUSE YOU AIN'T GOT NO MONEY!!!!!

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maconmann's favorite FMLs

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment and things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML

#618909
374 comments

I agree, your life sucks (183629) - you deserved it (27543)

On 03/26/2009 at 7:41am - intimacy - by JAY22 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was texting two people at once. Trying to respond to my friend's text, I accidentally clicked on this guy's name instead, who I've never met. He just told me about his grandma's funeral he went to that was an open casket. I responded with, "Haha wow you slut, I'm sure you were aroused." FML

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my best friend. We were on the beach and it was fairly crowded but we got in the water at this really secluded area. While we were swimming I looked up to see a homeless man wearing my clothes, walking away. FML

#495475
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53754) - you deserved it (27947)

On 03/20/2009 at 7:35pm - misc - by cjj325 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was with my grandma waiting in a line. She only speaks Chinese and there was a black man in front of us talking his phone. My grandma tells me that the black man's really loud and annoying. The man finishes and turns and said fluently in Chinese, "What's wrong with loud black men?" FML

#399721
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48591) - you deserved it (27634)

On 03/16/2009 at 10:09pm - misc - by kaichennnxx (man) - United States (California)

Today, my friends and I were drinking boba. On the side of the cup it said "Please drink carefully to avoid choking on the Boba". I started to laugh at the ridiculousness of the label, and choked on the boba in a coughing fit. FML

#296354
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12221) - you deserved it (61332)

On 03/13/2009 at 12:24am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at work and a very obese woman came in to get a pedicure. When she took her shoes off I noticed an odd black substance on her feet. I started scrubbing it off and wondered out loud, "What IS this stuff??" As a chunk of it fell onto my lip, she replied, "Girl, that's just the fungus." FML

#259526
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91278) - you deserved it (5290)

On 03/10/2009 at 7:55am - work - by SalonGirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home calling bingo numbers. One woman stood up and started making noises, so I assumed she had won and started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML

#32415
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77148) - you deserved it (9993)

On 02/12/2009 at 5:21pm - misc - by janedoe (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had sex with a girl who cried out as she came "Forgive me Lord! Forgive me Lord!" FML

#552
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48382) - you deserved it (5854)

On 12/19/2008 at 11:05am - intimacy - by chicochico - Sent from mobile version

Today, it has been a year and a half since my boyfriend discovered online poker. Annoyed to see him spending every evening playing on his laptop, I threatened him: “Now honey, you have to choose. It’s your poker or me!” Answer: “You are bluffing!” FML

#34
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46790) - you deserved it (10990)

On 10/25/2008 at 12:54pm - love - by Anonymous -



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