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mack636

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mack636

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  • Number of visits : 602
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mack636's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that doctors can be wrong. Pink clothes, pink stroller, pink bottles, pink bibs, pink cribs and pink bedding to go with my baby that recently came out with a little pink penis. FML

#4483118
427 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53221) - you deserved it (19909)

On 08/12/2009 at 7:36pm - kids - by Ouch (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my cousin came over. I left my iPod on shuffle in the room we were in as I left to go to the bathroom. When I came back she was jamming out to "My Dick" by Mickey Avalon. She won't stop singing it and her mom is coming over to pick her up in an hour. She's 4. FML

#4463161
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14111) - you deserved it (41814)

On 08/11/2009 at 11:34pm - kids - by SomeDJ (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I punched my wife in the face, because she jumped out from behind the bedroom door in the dark. I'm afraid of the dark. I'm 21. FML

#4328474
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24736) - you deserved it (38185)

On 08/06/2009 at 3:58am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had to call poison control because my idiot son swallowed a bunch of baking soda to "make a volcano in his tummy." FML

#4326730
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48804) - you deserved it (16157)

On 08/06/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was sitting on the bus next to a hot guy who was texting. I sneaked a peak at his phone to see if he was texting a girl so I could know if he was single. As I looked at his screen, he turned it towards me and typed in caps "STOP BEING A CREEPER." He got out of his seat and off the bus. FML

#4305194
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7892) - you deserved it (78244)

On 08/05/2009 at 9:37am - love - by TextLoser (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I came home from living in Spain for 2 years. My mom made dinner for me, and she had forgotten about my allergy to citrus, because she made lemon chicken. After using my EpiPen, and calling 911 for myself, I heard my mom say to my dad, "She always did have to be the center of attention." FML

#3927246
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58769) - you deserved it (3304)

On 07/21/2009 at 11:19am - health - by Lemonhead (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after a night of partying, I woke up in the middle of my co-ed dorm lobby to the sound of giggles. I was in a thong with $1 monopoly bills sticking out. I'm a guy. FML

#3849129
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14204) - you deserved it (46269)

On 07/18/2009 at 2:03am - misc - by joedoe (man) - United States (California)

Today, my brother replaced my cologne with whiskey. I have a job interview and I smell like a drunk. FML

#3838963
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41835) - you deserved it (3891)

On 07/17/2009 at 7:14pm - misc - by tukker (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my wife gave me head lice on purpose so I would have to cut off the ponytail that I've been growing since '99. FML

#3830576
334 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27745) - you deserved it (87737)

On 07/17/2009 at 12:59pm - love - by anonamous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to a neon themed party. Standing by the UV light, I looked down and realised my pad was glowing through my tights. FML

#3741117
349 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71133) - you deserved it (14592)

On 07/14/2009 at 8:23am - misc - by paddy (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my friend and I decided to get bikini waxes. Afterwards, the women who did the waxing told my friend it was $30 for her wax. Then, in front of the whole salon, the women points at me and says, "You! You so hairy- $35!". FML

#3669971
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55103) - you deserved it (8431)

On 07/11/2009 at 4:11pm - health - by waxinghorror (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I have to choose between one eyebrow or none because I'm a heavy sleeper and my brother is a moron. FML

#3669830
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57773) - you deserved it (4629)

On 07/11/2009 at 4:02pm - misc - by wow (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend threw me on the couch as I walked in the door. I butt dialed my mom in the process. My girlfriend took off my pants and we got to business. After about 30 seconds of hearing what was going on, my mom thought something was wrong and called the cops to my apartment. FML

#3669335
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48092) - you deserved it (7975)

On 07/11/2009 at 3:38pm - intimacy - by policeopenup (man) - United States (Texas)



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