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machiko

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machiko

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 5 March 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 22255
  • Number of comments : 196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About machiko : I believe in nothing. Not the end and not the start.

machiko's page activity

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machiko's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

machiko's favorite FMLs

Today, after taking my girlfriend on a date, she invited me back to her place for "hot coffee and dessert". Excitedly, I said yes. When we got there, we actually had coffee and dessert. When I told her this wasn't what I'd had in mind, she kicked me out for being a pervert. FML

#8974087
382 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8743) - you deserved it (59886)

On 03/10/2010 at 4:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML

#8817091
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21669) - you deserved it (7052)

On 03/04/2010 at 1:43am - intimacy - by fml1977 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was at a concert and an older man offered to let me stand in front of him because I'm short. It wasn't until the show started and people were jumping around did I realize he had a boner and was repeatedly bumping into me. FML

#8765268
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22179) - you deserved it (2497)

On 03/02/2010 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Lin - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I brought to her attention a rather large zit on the corner of her mouth. She called me an insensitive prick. I only pointed it out because I didn't want other people to see it and make fun of her. FML

#8624928
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20947) - you deserved it (18418)

On 02/24/2010 at 9:26pm - love - by pickit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my roommate brought a kitten to the apartment. I hate cats, and probably sensing this, the thing clawed me right in the crotch. I of course am not going to say a thing because I happen to be in love with my roommate, but she has no clue how much I hate this thing. FML

#8621697
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12158) - you deserved it (23562)

On 02/24/2010 at 7:29pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I was at the beach with my boyfriend in Key West. I had gotten a bikini wax and new swimsuit for the occasion. My boyfriend was being romantic until he pulled a long hair from a mole on my leg. It's all fun and games until the mole starts bleeding, profusely. FML

#8510516
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23730) - you deserved it (3917)

On 02/21/2010 at 7:56am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while in bed with my game obsessed girlfriend, she told me I was a "noob" in bed. FML

#8455591
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18270) - you deserved it (5851)

On 02/19/2010 at 8:47pm - intimacy - by anonymous - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in bed, when suddenly, he turned to me and started playing with my breasts as if they were turn tables and he was the DJ. FML

#8406793
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15187) - you deserved it (4448)

On 02/18/2010 at 12:36pm - intimacy - by goldie09 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my pissed off girlfriend used window marker to write racist comments on my car window. This would include: nazi symbols, white power, and a few others I won't mention. I live in a predominately black neighborhood. FML

#8081301
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30985) - you deserved it (3822)

On 02/10/2010 at 4:08am - misc - by ... - United States

Today, I texted my girlfriend that I'm going to 'lick my professor's ass' instead of 'kick' due to auto-correction on my phone. FML

#8052532
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11940) - you deserved it (23716)

On 02/09/2010 at 2:10pm - misc - by kingmetal42 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that I'm not actually pregnant. I've apparently been having a hysterical pregnancy because I want a child so badly. I don't know which was worse, the look of relief on my husband's face or having to send a mass email to inform my family and friends. FML

#7841341
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27259) - you deserved it (7920)

On 02/03/2010 at 6:58am - misc - by sadface - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mother urged me to "get over this lesbian thing and give me some grandkids." In front of my girlfriend of eleven months. FML

#7583250
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36350) - you deserved it (11839)

On 01/26/2010 at 1:05am - love - by Eagle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I refused to share a toothbrush with her. FML

#7518795
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32812) - you deserved it (5663)

On 01/23/2010 at 11:14am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was holding my son and smelled poop so I checked his diaper, but there was nothing there. Then I realized it was my breath. FML

#7509871
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8090) - you deserved it (34798)

On 01/22/2010 at 10:16pm - kids - by Chan (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I drove 4 hours to see my girlfriend of a year, as she had asked me to stay with her for a few days. When I arrived she told me she wanted to be friends as she liked someone else, but wanted me to stay the few days so we could work on being friends. FML

#7404884
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29376) - you deserved it (1974)

On 01/17/2010 at 7:30pm - love - by longtrip (man) - United Kingdom (Leeds)



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