machiko

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machiko

17Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 5 March 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 25144
  • Number of comments : 196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About machiko : I believe in nothing. Not the end and not the start.

machiko's page activity

Visits<b>ilikedogs123123</b> - one hour ago<b>tikatica</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 12:41pm<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 11:07am<b>ananicosia</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 8:24am<b>SugarRush905</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 3:28am<b>Bullshitticus</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 9:56am<b>Rozeyyy</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 9:07pm<b>ptvbabe229</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 6:03pm<b>Helipilot86</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 1:16pm<b>AtomOfEpic</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 7:19am<b>ShroudedKnife</b> - the 06/28/2016 at 12:09am<b>itssnotfunny</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 2:07am<b>thatoneguy255</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 3:18pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 7:18am<b>cheyluvsturtles</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 8:43pm<b>lego_otter</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 10:20pm<b>GuardedCrayfish</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 7:24pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 3:30am

Fucked!<b>54754N4</b> - the 07/27/2016 at 4:40pm<b>SugarRush905</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 9:28am<b>AtomOfEpic</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 1:19pm<b>cheyluvsturtles</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 2:43am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 9:30am<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 10:45pm<b>JCX2</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 11:14pm<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 8:15am<b>Ethan_Anonymous</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 11:13am<b>gqlmno</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 2:59pm<b>mattv88</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 7:00am<b>jomar_19</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 5:34am<b>Bree06</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:31pm<b>MrFloooo</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 7:20am<b>sherry_berryxoxo</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 9:27pm<b>FiendHunter</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 5:37am

machiko's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

machiko's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my 21st birthday. I had a simple party with my boyfriend, with just a cake and a bottle of red wine. My boyfriend managed to get so drunk that he danced naked for 10 minutes, then told me I'm hideously obese but that he loves me anyway. FML

by sadinmass / 11/13/2010 at 8:24am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I was in a public washroom and I had to take a dump. I knew how dirty the toilets were, so tried to do the "stand and poo." Unfortunately, I slipped and the poo fell on the ground. Then I realized there were no paper towels. There was a line outside waiting. FML

by sweet_stufz / 11/11/2010 at 8:30am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, a girl who has had a problem with me for as long as I can remember, tagged me in a Facebook status update in which she equated my intelligence to that of a mollusk and equated my weight to that of a hippopotamus. My boyfriend, as well as several of my "friends," liked it. FML

by smarter than a mollusk, skinner than a hippo / 11/10/2010 at 12:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I am 3 months pregnant. While lying on the couch with morning sickness, my boyfriend farted loudly and filled the room with a smell so horrifying that I immediately threw up all over my coffee table. He spent the next 20 minutes texting his friends about this "epic" moment. FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2010 at 1:32pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML

by Anonymous / 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, I was so lonely that I had a 3 hour conversation with a one-legged cricket I found in my room. I'm keeping him. He has a name. FML

by nk / 11/03/2010 at 12:39am / United States (Kentucky) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend, who is a great cook, decided to try his hand at baking. The cookies he made looked weird but tasted good. I jokingly said, "They taste great, but they look awful!" He responded by saying, "I could say the same thing about you." FML

by yummy(: / 10/30/2010 at 10:14pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex for the first time. While we were undressing each other, he said, "Wow, if we have children, you're gonna have to shave, or they'll die from rug-burn as they come out!" FML

by tht1chk / 10/30/2010 at 8:37pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was on the phone with my girlfriend. Just as she said "I love you", the credit on my phone runs out. She now thinks that I've purposely hung up on her. She refuses to speak to me until I tell her the real reason I hung up. FML

by lovegotmehung / 10/29/2010 at 12:48am / United Kingdom / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were snuggling and telling eachother nice things. The nicest thing he could think of to say to me was "Well, I see you shaved your mustache." FML

by Anonymous / 10/27/2010 at 2:12am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I asked my boyfriend what he was being for halloween. He said "Single". FML

by Anonymous / 10/27/2010 at 2:01am / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I babysat my neighbour's spoilt bratty twins. When I told them it was their bed time, they pushed me over. One then started smashing me with a plastic sword, and as I lay helpless on the floor the other one peed on me. I got owned by two five year olds. FML

by peestain / 10/25/2010 at 6:06am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Kids

Today, I got very drunk after being fired from my job. In my depressed, intoxicated state, I posted my facebook status as 'Goodbye world'. The only response was from my dad saying 'cya'. His comment got 29 likes. FML

by drunkfacebookuser / 10/23/2010 at 9:15am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking down my very steep basement stairs when I fell and rolled all the way down but luckily I didn't hurt anything. While walking back up around the very last stair, my cat jumped out on me, causing me to roll all the way back down. FML

by catattack78 / 10/21/2010 at 10:48am / United States (Maryland) / Health

Today, I met my roommate for the first time. I walked in the door to see him in full Roman gladiator gear, screaming at the computer because he lost 18 knights. He also told me he wakes up every 3 hours to make sure his army is still intact. FML

by Anonymous / 10/20/2010 at 3:00am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous