About machiko : I believe in nothing. Not the end and not the start.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to exchange presents for our birthdays. I spent $100 on perfume and Victoria's Secret clothes. She bought me a bag of lifesavers, then asked me to leave because she wanted to take a nap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62901) - you deserved it (3797)
On 03/11/2009 at 4:46pm - love - by cdick (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I walked into the kitchen and accidentally broke my mother's vase. I said, "Accidents happen." She replied, "Yeah, like your birth." FML
I agree, your life sucks (83389) - you deserved it (15537)
On 03/07/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Cody (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to visit my Grandmother, accidentally leaving my phone home during the weekend. When I got back I had 2 texts from my crush. One saying "I want to take the most beautiful girl to prom, go with me?" and the other saying, "Fine fattie, I'll ask someone else." FML
I agree, your life sucks (61314) - you deserved it (5441)
On 03/06/2009 at 9:55pm - love - by promdump (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was telling my boyfriend I had fake orgasms all the time to piss him off. He replied: "that's okay, I'm f***ing three other girls." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42241) - you deserved it (103886)
On 03/05/2009 at 1:01am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was on my way home from a friends house. I called home ahead of time to let my parents know. My dad picked up and in a panting voice said, "Now isn't a good time, drive around the block for 15 minutes." FML
I agree, your life sucks (83082) - you deserved it (4512)
On 03/03/2009 at 11:20am - intimacy - by hlev24 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I came home to find that my room had been ransacked. My mom comes out of no where and says that we need to have a talk. I freaked out thinking it was all the empty alcohol bottles under my bed. My mom holds up the birth control and says "I always knew you were a whore." FML
I agree, your life sucks (54448) - you deserved it (12868)
On 03/02/2009 at 4:03pm - misc - by Stairway2Heaven - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my mom bought me a t-shirt from the store. It has the U.S. Marines logo on it and says "Marines' Girlfriend". I'm a straight 16 year old boy and my mom only reads and speaks Spanish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47989) - you deserved it (3384)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:49am - misc - by Elis (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML
I agree, your life sucks (989136) - you deserved it (78715)
On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)
Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend masturbating so I said to her, "Need a hand with that?" to which she replied "I'm doing fine here on my own, don't ruin it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (74734) - you deserved it (17308)
On 02/23/2009 at 8:14am - intimacy - by Anonn (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I went to the store to buy some condoms for my girlfriend, Kim and I. I was in a rush and when I looked at the cashier realized it was her father. Nervous and hoping to reassure him, I go "don't worry, I'm not using these with Kim." That didn't help. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21498) - you deserved it (55972)
On 02/22/2009 at 8:38pm - intimacy - by madfather (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, while I was making out with my boyfriend, he left my dorm suddenly without telling me where he was going. A few hours later, he texted me to tell me that being with me made him feel dirty and he had gone to confession. He then called me a sinner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67057) - you deserved it (5797)
On 02/21/2009 at 10:23pm - intimacy - by not getting any anymore (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I complimented my mom with "Hey, I think you lost some weight." She replied with "Yeah, I think you found it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36054) - you deserved it (5020)
On 02/18/2009 at 4:09pm - health - by Kristina (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my friend had a Coke can on his desk in class. It was empty but I was thirsty so I picked it up thinking I could try to get that little bit of Coke always left at the bottom. When I took a sip I found out he had been picking his fingernails and putting them in the can. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13383) - you deserved it (40202)
On 02/18/2009 at 9:29am - misc - by Thatkid (man) - Singapore
Today, I told my dad I was leaving to get some beauty sleep. He looked at me laughing and said "See you in a decade." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34118) - you deserved it (5337)
On 02/16/2009 at 10:05am - misc - by mags (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was hooking up with a guy for the first time and he told me I was in luck. When I asked why he replied, "I like little boobs." FML
I agree, your life sucks (43428) - you deserved it (4831)
On 02/15/2009 at 4:44pm - intimacy - by miapapaya (woman) - United States (Florida)
Monday 20 May 2013
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