machiko

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machiko

17Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 5 March 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 26028
  • Number of comments : 196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About machiko : I believe in nothing. Not the end and not the start.

machiko's page activity

Visits<b>AlphaPrince13</b> - yesterday at 6:57pm<b>angrykid11</b> - the 11/29/2016 at 9:36pm<b>TexanZaros</b> - the 11/20/2016 at 10:56pm<b>eknock</b> - the 11/03/2016 at 2:20am<b>xXl_Exodus_lXx</b> - the 10/22/2016 at 5:21pm<b>DeMamp</b> - the 10/19/2016 at 4:20am<b>jaker4p17</b> - the 10/13/2016 at 7:04pm<b>Nonemustknow</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 2:40am<b>Oihana</b> - the 09/24/2016 at 6:02pm<b>L1MEY</b> - the 09/14/2016 at 2:08am<b>mbdresnick</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 7:02am<b>Parkourlife20</b> - the 09/03/2016 at 10:01am<b>metricsystem1</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 10:16am<b>Chibster</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 9:28pm<b>ilikedogs123123</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 10:09am<b>tikatica</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 12:41pm<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 11:07am<b>ananicosia</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 8:24am

Fucked!<b>54754N4</b> - the 07/27/2016 at 4:40pm<b>SugarRush905</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 9:28am<b>AtomOfEpic</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 1:19pm<b>cheyluvsturtles</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 2:43am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 9:30am<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 10:45pm<b>JCX2</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 11:14pm<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 8:15am<b>Ethan_Anonymous</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 11:13am<b>gqlmno</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 2:59pm<b>mattv88</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 7:00am<b>jomar_19</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 5:34am<b>Bree06</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:31pm<b>MrFloooo</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 7:20am<b>sherry_berryxoxo</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 9:27pm<b>FiendHunter</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 5:37am

machiko's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

machiko's favorite FMLs

Today, while lying in bed with my girlfriend and she was grabbing the fat on my stomach I said to her "stop touching my fat". She replied "so don't touch you at all?" FML

by justinherass / 03/28/2009 at 1:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was at my friends house celebrating his 16th birthday. I couldn't find my phone so I asked my friend's girl if I could borrow her phone to see if I could hear mine ringing. I dial my number and look down to find she has my number is saved in her phone as ASS FACE #3. FML

by Anonymous / 03/24/2009 at 12:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend came over for dinner, but couldn't eat because he had just gotten his tongue pierced. My grandpa heard this, winked at my boyfriend and said "Can't eat now, but I bet that's all you'll be doing in a few weeks..." My super protective father was sitting right next to him. FML

by Anonymous / 03/24/2009 at 6:41am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I work in a grocery store and a woman suffering from diarrhea somehow managed to get shit up and down two of the store aisles, then go to the ladies room and mess up the stall. I was the only one working trained in deal with bio-hazardous waste so I had to clean it up. FML

by frenchy / 03/24/2009 at 1:47am / United States (Wisconsin) / Work

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

by konens_dick / 03/22/2009 at 6:38am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2009 at 3:18am / Canada (British Columbia) / Geek

Today, my boyfriend and I were at his house having sex. After about 30 minutes, his mom came home and was knocking on the door asking "What are you doing?" Thinking I might have a chance to sneak out, I got dressed real quiet. Then my boyfriend answers, "Zoe. I'm doing Zoe." FML

by Zoe123 / 03/19/2009 at 2:05am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Afterwards we went to Applebees for dinner, then after we'd ate I asked "How was it?" he says "It was terrible", to which I said "The food was that bad?" He replies "No, the sex". FML

by JC12345 / 03/18/2009 at 12:35am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I woke up, completely naked, in bed with a guy I met the night before. We were both drunk the night before and I had agreed to go home with him. The reason I woke up was that someone was knocking on his bedroom door. Turns out he lives with his mom and she made us pancakes. FML

by Nikki / 03/17/2009 at 11:15pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, our school had tryouts for chorus. Everybody sang a snippet of the song together until the teacher stopped us, saying it sounded awful. He singled me out and told me to sing alone. After I sang the part, he said, "Son, your gift to God will be silence." FML

by Sebastian / 03/17/2009 at 7:06pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, our school had tryouts for chorus. Everybody sang a snippet of the song together until the teacher stopped us, saying it sounded awful. He singled me out and told me to sing alone. After I sang the part, he said, "Son, your gift to God will be silence." FML

by Sebastian / 03/17/2009 at 7:06pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML

by DSM / 03/14/2009 at 7:05am / United States (North Dakota) / Love

Today, I met a really nice couple at a bar. We talked and the conversation eventually drifted towards online dating. I casually commented that hooking up through the internet was sad and pathetic. Turns out they met on Myspace. FML

by bigmouth / 03/14/2009 at 4:43am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

by Noname / 03/12/2009 at 5:30am / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to exchange presents for our birthdays. I spent $100 on perfume and Victoria's Secret clothes. She bought me a bag of lifesavers, then asked me to leave because she wanted to take a nap. FML

by cdick / 03/11/2009 at 4:46pm / United States (Virginia) / Love